Grief

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-sick itself-

My knees are weak,
wounded, clouded with abscess, swollen.
I am tired of kneeling.
Praying.
Crying.
Pleading with you.
All I want is freedom,
freedom from the world.

Why must I suffer for your love?
I am a good person,
and I care too much about everything.
Why wont they love me?
Why don't you love me?
And I try,
I try so hard
to be good
good in your eyes.

I gave up meat because I love your creatures,
and I rid thoughts of hate
so that I could love your children!

I love the Jews
the gays
the blacks
the whites
the indians
the native americans
the muslims
the catholics
the atheists
the asians
the bahai's
the sinners
the bugs
the sky
the dirt
the earth.

I pray to you!
I scream for you!
Why can't I live for you,
and have the world too!?

I am at peace with who I am,
but angry with the world
your children,
the ones I love so much.

Why do we steal!?
Why do we kill!?
Why do we hate!?
Why do we that do not suffer!?

And I am so tired,
tired and sick.

sick of everything, everything that is sick itself

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