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The Grace in Pain
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I could write forever about pain. Today though I want to talk about physical pain.
I live in physical pain everyday. The biggest amount of pain comes from a shoulder injury that I got serving in the military overseas. It’s a long interesting story but not the point of this post. So I’ll circle back now.
Pain- It seems like every time I get use to a certain level of pain I get more pain. Because of the shoulder I have been through two surgeries – one on my shoulder itself which was only able to fix part of the problem and one surgery on my neck where they had to replace a disk. (Side note yes I really did get shorter after that surgery and that’s not cool when your already short! I need every inch.) Anyway now I have a pain going through to my wrist. An unnerving pain that aches with everything I do.
Have you ever heard that quote “I don’t have time for pain” Yeah that’s me I say that – daily. I have a husband, five kids, leading Mops, household responsibilities, my writing, the list goes on. Moms never even have the time to go to the bathroom by themselves, let alone time to feel pain.
I have prayed for healing. I felt like I got my answer, when I got the original injury. This pain is for a reason, I didn’t understand the pain when I first got it. I learned that having pain wasn’t a bad thing. It’s kept me human, kept me not overdoing it, kept me at home, and most importantly it has kept me on my knees asking for His help to get through the day because I can’t do it on my own.
Over time this pain – though I get discouraged – I really do look at it as a blessing. A blessing that has kept me eating my humble pie.
Though when new pain comes up – new pain that I have to deal with, I find myself asking “Why” all over again.
It already stinks not being able to throw a ball with my kids. I get sad that it hurts to pick them up after ten pounds. My four year old has known for a few years if she wants to be held I have to sit down.
Why does the pain never stop? Because I’m not home, this world is full of pain. So often I get wrapped up in wanting my kids to not remember me as a mom that’s always in pain. I stopped remembering that this world is going to have pain and suffering. This is not the end. Eternity with Jesus is the end game. That’s where the pain stops.
I’ve often gone back to the passage in 2 Corinthians 12, where Paul asks God three times to take away the “thorn in his flesh.” I know I am not even close to the level Paul was at yet Gods answer to him is one that I’ve embraced myself.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Cor 12:9
Isn’t that beautiful? God’s grace is sufficient. Can you imagine if you could say no to your children with such elegance?
That’s basically what God did here – he said no. But he did it for a good reason. It did it to keep Paul from being conceited.
So when I’m embarrassed about what my body can’t do. I need to remember that God’s grace needs to be sufficient.
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