Kids & Parenting

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Yes, it has happened. Today is the day I killed the Tooth Fairy. I took a fairy sized swatter and squished her against the wall. Ok, maybe I’m being a little dramatic here, but what a devastating morning for all involved.

For the past several weeks, my youngest has had a loose tooth that he has diligently been trying to pull out. Why, the persistent wiggling and moving of that shiny molar? Cash, of course. Yes, I am the mother that has perpetuated lies…the Tooth Fairy, Santa, the Easter Bunny.

Before my husband and I had children, we never discussed this area of parenting. I wish we had because then maybe I wouldn’t be sitting here writing this today. You see, he was raised in a home without these mythical creatures. His mom was smart. Whether she did this to be honest or so that she would not have to be chained to the extra work associated with these lies, I don’t know. What I do know, is that I was raised in an environment where these imaginary beings were real. They wrote me letters, left me presents, and left me feeling extremely betrayed when I was given the news that all of society had band together to lie to me.

My husband was rather void of an opinion regarding this area, so he left it to me. Honestly, even though I was not yet a Christian, I did struggle with the idea of lying to my children about magical creatures that were not real, but I succumbed to the pressure of my mother. She assured me that denying my children of this childhood lie, would screw them up for life and it would be all my fault. They would resent me, even hate me, she shared, if I didn’t go along with what the majority of what society did. So, with that unsettling thought, I gave in and Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were born in my home. That was over 10 years ago.

Now as I mentioned earlier, I only became a Christian a few years back. And after my introduction to God, I must admit, that that’s pretty much where my relationship with Him stayed…at the introduction phase. My family and I attended a very large church in our area. We would go each Sunday, among the masses of many people. Really just a number in the cattle call of Christianity…no one would talk to us. We were nameless faces in a crowd of many lost individuals. We would sing a few songs, be told how much God loved us no matter what we did all week and that all of the bad things that we did, didn’t matter because God would forgive us anyway. Well, needless to say, while I am grateful to have had my introduction to the Divine, I was not growing in my walk with God. We were at a stand still. He loved me. I sinned. I kept sinning and I didn’t know how to move forward. But as more time passed, the more uncomfortable I grew with the imaginary gift giving friends that would occasionally visit our home.

Fast forward a few years, we have found a wonderful Bible teaching church and guess what? People actually talk to me and know my name. Well, beyond that, these people have become my family and lovingly hold me accountable to grow in my relationship with God and be a wife and mother that lives my life according to what the Bible teaches us. My walk with God is no longer at a standstill. I now am running with open arms towards Jesus each and every day. While this is fantastic news, it leads me to a significant problem. My children have been raised by a mother that has lied to them all of their lives and now I fear that when they find out this awful news, they will question what I have told them about Jesus too.

Now let’s go the events of this morning. My youngest son, who is 8, is extremely sensitive and a bit moody, to be honest. His moods and perceptions of life are highly influenced by the circumstances he is surrounded by. This is something we are working on. Well, when he came down this morning, I could tell he was in a dark place. He was angry and sad all at the same time. Pure devastation is the best way to describe what I saw. When I inquired as to how he was doing today, he responded, “The tooth fairy didn’t come.” Nooooo! The perpetuator of childhood lies and mythical creatures FORGOT to keep up the awful charade and left the tooth and forgot the cash, which resulted in utter devastation to my 8 year old son. My heart began to race, panic set in…so I did what any lying, manipulating mother would do…my mind quickly began to formulate how I would fix and keep up my facade. I quickly began to console him, asking if he was sure she hadn’t come that maybe the money had dropped on the floor. He quickly assured me it hadn’t. I then began to make excuses for my pretend taker of teeth and shared that I thought maybe she was on vacation. Are you kidding me? Who am I? Is this truly who I’ve become? The tooth fairy is on VACATION!?

I wish I could tell you it ended there, but my shame continues as I then raced up the stairs to wake up my 10 year old son. As one eye reluctantly opened, I quickly asked him if he had any cash. Oh, how I long to tell you this wasn’t the case, but its true and yes, it still gets worse from here. As my groggy 10 year old sits up, he tells me he only has one dollar, but wanted to know why I would need money. Now at this point I want to tell you that I snapped out of my forgetful tooth fairy induced fog, back to reality and truth, but no, I didn’t. Instead of stopping this awful charade, I then beg my older son for help. I elicit him to lie to his brother of how the tooth fairy once forgot to pick up his tooth, so that my shame of lying mom and deceptor of my children will not be revealed. At least not today…

My oldest, who loves to be the hero, swoops in and saves the day. Sharing his own story of how the tooth fairy once didn’t come and pick up his tooth, but the next day he received an email (yes, I created a false email from a mythical creature), explaining that she had been on vacation and would return soon. Relieved, my youngest trots back downstairs with the hope of a vacationing fairy soon returning to give him cash for his pearly white tooth.

How did this happen? I don’t share all of this so you can tell me what an awful mother I am or how I should be ashamed of myself. Yes, I know. But you see, I can’t help wonder if there are others out there in a similar situation. Have you lived your life one way, in the ways of the world, and started that path with your own children, only to realize there is a better way? What do we do if we are changing how we live and how we want our children to live? We tell the truth. We share our sin. We ask their forgiveness and we pray. We pray a lot. We ask God to protect the hearts our precious little ones that have been lied to. We pray that our children will know that Jesus is real and not question his existence. And most importantly we trust. We trust God to handle the entire situation because only He can and only He will.





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