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The Dangers of Dysfunctional Families

by John Clark 
03/28/13
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We all know that there are many dysfunctional families today. Whether it is by divorce or domestic strife, these living environments pose a problem for the young adults becoming the next generation. They have witnessed and learned how their parents have handled negative situations. Many of them may take their learned behavior into their own real world, and future families.

Generational curses could develop. I define a generational curse as a dysfunctional behavior that has become a norm. It is a negative or destructive way of dealing with difficult people or circumstances. If this is all our children have been exposed to, how will they know any differently? So, we end up with a new generation of dysfunctional young adults, which will include more anger issues, abusive relationships, domestic battles, addictions, mental illness, and anything else you can think of. In addition to all of this, the local church has not come through for them; our young people are leaving the church by the droves.

It makes me wonder how these young people are dealing with life when they are going away to college, or moving away to start families and careers. How do they feel about themselves? What kind of people are they associating with, and are they developing good, positive relationships? If they are professing Christians, how is this all impacting their faith? Over half of our young people are leaving the church and forsaking the practice of their faith. Here is the big question. Are these people choosing to break away from their past by not allowing it to continue and, if so, how are they intending to do it?

It is a big mistake to assume that they will rise above their past family environment and get it together from an emotional and relational standpoint.

We must pray for them consistently. We must also keep in touch with them often and encourage them to talk about what is going on in their lives and how things are working out. This cannot be left to chance! If they do not come to visit, then we must visit them, take them out to dinner, and initiate conversations.

This of course, is necessary for all of our young people, but especially those coming out of dysfunctional families, and considering the fact that almost half of all marriages are ending in divorce.

Let's uphold our young people, help them rise above a negative past and get life right the first time. We must not allow them to make decisions based upon consequences from their past that will have more negative results in the future.

Here are some suggestions.

1. As already stated, visit them and initiate conversations that will encourage them to talk about their lives.

2. Encourage them to develop a support group of people to which they can talk when life gets difficult, or when needing to make major decisions. Emphasize seeking wise counsel. The Bible says that in the multitude of counselors there is wisdom.

3. Pray for them daily, commiting them to the loving care and protection of the Lord.

4. Seek to find out how they are using their time because that says a lot about a person.

5. It is important to know how they are handling life when it does not go as planned. Are they wallowing in depression and defeat or are they setting new goals and directions?

6. Are they doing what is necessary to break a generationall curse, if they have one? Are they aware of, and utilizing the resources available to do this, like counseling, anger management, support groups, etc.?




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