Encouragement

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It's still here.

Even though I am on medicine. Even though I thought I had beaten it. Even though I despise it and how it makes me feel. Depression is still here. It can still grab hold of me and shake me. It can still make me dissolve into tears. It can still make me feel like every day is a wasted effort.

I wonder - what kind of cruel joke could have perpetuated this lie? Obviously depression strikes when I am at my lowest, but how can it grip so tightly? Just a few days ago I was on top of the world. No matter what bad things life threw my way, I was going strong, not worrying.

Not anymore.

In the matter of a couple of days I have escaped from my happy land into a constant state of turmoil. Every small challenge feels like the weight of the world on my shoulders, bearing down harder and harder. Every child's scream makes me want to scream, to cry in frustration. Not the ideal state of mind for a mother of two.

I always know when my lows feel even lower that depression is rearing its ugly head again. But having felt so good for a little while, I felt spoiled. I felt like that happiness should be a part of who I was all the time. How silly of me, to think that I could shake such an existence. Silly indeed.

Sound familiar?

If you are now or have ever been depressed it should. It's amazing how depression gathers steam so quickly when we thought it didn't have control over us anymore, don't you think? I think it is. I like to think of depression as a monster controlled by the devil. Whenever we are at our weakest, the devil pushes, and nudges, and finally shoves until depression is once again controlling us.

It's just like the devil, isn't it? He can't fight us when we are strong so he waits. And when we have fallen sufficiently enough and feel like the weight of the world is on top of us he springs, toppling us over. And if we give in, look at all he has gained... He has made us question our very existence, ignore our children or other loved ones and even ourselves; Even forget about our God. He watches our faith fall and sees us struggle and sometimes he even watches in glee when we ultimately give up on life.

That's a lot of power to give to such an evil being. I might not be able to control depression, but I can control how low I allow myself to sink. I can control how much power I allow the devil to have over my life. Can you?

Can you look up in the darkest of times, when your depression is taking over your mind, and cry out to God. Can you remember that He will answer your prayers? That He cares about You? That is a promise repeated in the Bible.


Psalm 61:1-2
1Hear my cry, O God;
listen to my prayer.
2From the ends of the earth I call to you,
I call as my heart grows faint;
lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
3For you have been my refuge,
a strong tower against the foe.
4I long to dwell in your tent forever
and take refuge in the shelter of your wings.


Do you know that there is a God who loves you, even when you are depressed? Have you given yourself to the Lord? During my darkest times, faith is what keeps me from attempting the ultimate sin. And when I did face the unforgivable sin face to face – the Lord still rescued me and helped me climb out of that pit of despair. My faith in God is what allows me to face tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that...What does it for you?

I challenge you to find that one reason, that one belief, which can keep you from letting the devil have so much power over you. If you already know the Lord, allow him to be your source of strength. If you don't know of the Lord let your heart be opened to learning more about Him.

I forget my own lessons often. I still face many days of fighting the devil. I’ve been hospitalized and close to death. And I’ve found my own sins unforgivable. But God has not, and he has continued to forgive me of them. But if I can look up at my lowest and remember that God is there, I can fall on my knees and allow the strength of our Father in heaven to lift me up. When I am at my lowest, the only defense I have is the strength of the Lord. He has promised us that he would not give us more than we could handle. He has guaranteed us that nothing in this life can tempt us beyond what we are able to bear:


I Corinthians 10:13
13No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

It's easy to let depression overcome you. I know I have let it, time and time again, overtake me. I have forgotten that I have another far greater source of strength to draw upon when I am at my weakest. Self pity never makes me feel any better and it never makes me stronger.

But there is a way to feel stronger even in the midst of your weaknesses! And believe me, if anything is a weakness to overcome, it is depression. But it's not a weakness to be ashamed of. Our weaknesses are what make us human. Faith in God is what allows us to rise beyond those weaknesses. And I don't know anything stronger and more powerful than God. So who better to lean on than the Creator of the universe?

Even Paul knew how important it was to allow God to be our source of strength. Look what he wrote to the church in Corinth in II Corinthians:

II Corinthians 12:9
9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.


Even Paul knew that the only way to have strength was through God. Was Paul ever depressed? Maybe, maybe not. But this is true no matter what:"For when I am weak, then I am strong."

Are you strong when you are weak? You can be! You can remember, in the midst of your depression, to be strong. If you can remember that your weaknesses are in place for God to work in your life, you can be stronger indeed. In fact, you could eventually even overcome depression itself, through the use of the Lord's strength.

I'm not there yet - are you?

But I want to be - do you?

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