Testimonies

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This post is not about me. This post is about Jesus and what He has done and is currently doing in my life. It is my hope to show you how Jesus can take your life and make it into the kind of life you have always been yearning to live. Some of the things I talk about in this current post and in others in the future may be hard to hear, hard to believe, and hard to stomach. But these things will have to be talked about, especially when we get to talk about why things in this world are the way they are and why God isn't stopping any of it in the way we think He should.

I realize that family and friends may be reading this blog and may hear things about myself that they have never heard before or have known in little detail. But that will not stop me from saying what needs to be said. I will say what need to say and leave it up to God to decide how to use my words and how to affect people with them. Since I have given my life to Jesus I have become what is called a transparent person. Ask anyone who has heard about my history and they will tell you that I am brutally honest when it comes to talking about my past. There are some things that I will talk about that even my children have never heard. I pray that this post will help them understand the father they, honestly, never really knew since the man I am now is in so many ways a completely and far better man that I was in the past. With that said, let me tell you who I was.

I was born on July 31, 1958. As I grew older, I thought that the life I was living was normal. I thought that my temper, working as much as I could to be away from home, my spending habits, constant arguing with my ex-wife, and many other habits were what it meant to be a man. In 1997, I attempted suicide twice, but something always seemed to stop me. In November of that year I began having breakdowns and crying spells that I did not understand. "What is wrong with me," I kept asking myself. Then, in January of 1998, I started having flashbacks and dreams that scared me and I became very depressed over all of it. I remembered a couple of dreams that I knew I had been having for most of my life. Dreams of a monster at my bedroom window saying, "I'm coming to get you

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