Gospel

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After this
I saw
four angels
standing
at
the four
corners
of the
earth.
[Revelation 7:1]
*******************
"I FOUND A GAFFE,
LORD*!
I FOUND A GAFFE!"

[TURN TO HIS RIGHT.]
"A GAFFE?"

[GENTLE VOICE.]
"It's a motion-picture
term, Father.......
from the twentieth
and twenty-first century.
It means......"

[GRUFF VOICE.]
"I know what a GAFFE
MEANS! What is Our
precious beloved..
talking about?"

[GENTLE CHUCKLE.]

(Yell to the ceiling.)
"I FOUND A GAFFE!
IN REVELATION,
LORD! IN THE BOOK
OF REVELATION!
YAHOOOOOO!"

[GRUFF SIGH.]
"Where,
My precious."

(Happy shout.)
"IT'S IN THE PART
ABOUT THE 4 CORNERS!
THE 4 CORNERS OF
THE EARTH, LORD!
IT'S A GAFFE!"

[GENTLE CHUCKLING
FROM THE RIGHT SIDE
OF THE THRONE.]

[GRUFF VOICE.]
"Show
Me,
My precious one."

"HERE!
RIGHT HERE, LORD!
IT'S RIGHT HERE!"
(Pointing and smiling.)
(Smiling and pointing.)

[GRUFF NOD.]
[SIGH.]
"Read It
to Me,
Mein kin'der."

(Flipping around pages.)
(Tear a page.)
(Flip.)
(Flip.)
"HERE! I FOUND IT!
I FOUND IT!"

[GRUFF NOD.]
"Go ON."

(Pointing and reading,
out loud: really loud.)
"AFTER THIS,
I SAW FOUR ANGELS
STANDING AT THE
FOUR CORNERS OF
THE EARTH, HOLDING
BACK THE FOUR
WINDS OF THE EARTH,
THAT NO WIND MIGHT
BLOW ON EARTH OR
SEA OR AGAINST ANY
TREE**!"

[GRUFF NOD.]
"Hm, hm."

"WELL? IT'S A GAFFE!
THE WORLD'S NOT
FLAT! IT'S NOT FLAT!
IT AIN'T A BOX WITH FOUR CORNERS!
IT'S ROUND!"
(Shout to the ceiling.)
"IT'S R....O....U.....N.....D!"

[GRUFF SIGH.]
[GLANCE OVER TO
HIS RIGHT.]

[GENTLE CHUCKLING.]

"YOU SHOULD'A KNOWN THAT!
THE EARTH AIN'T FLAT,
LORD!
IT'S ROUND!
REMEMBER.....
CHRISTOPHER
COLUMBUS?"

[GENTLE BURST OF
LAUGHTER FROM THE
RIGHT SIDE OF THE
THRONE.]

[GRUFFLY PATIENT
NOD.]
[SIGH.]
"Yes,
My beloved precious.
I remember him."

(Shout.)
"WELL, FOURTEEN
HUNDRED AND 90-SOME
YEARS LATER, HE GOT IN A
BOAT, AND PROVED
TO EVERYBODY THAT
THE EARTH WAS ROUND!
REMEMBER THE NINA,
THE PINTA, AND
THE SANTA MARIA?
IT WAS ROUND, LORD!
THE EARTH WAS ROUND!
NOT FLAT!
YOU GOOFED!"

[MORE LAUGHTER
COMING FROM THE
THRONE TO THE
RIGHT.]

[GRUFF SHAKE
OF THE HEAD.]
"Oy vey z'mir."

[GENTLE VOICE.]
"Well, Father......
You did wish for her
to read Our Book."

[GRUFF VOICE.]
"WISH?"

[GENTLE VOICE.]
"It's just Old English,
Father.....You know:
to desire something,
to yearn for it....."

[GRUFF VOICE.]
"I KNOW WHAT IT
MEANS! THIS CHILD
OF MINE IS DRIVING
ME MESHUGU'NAH!"

(Happy shout.)
"THERE AIN'T NO
FOUR CORNERS,
LORD! IT'S ALL ROUND!
HOW CAN THE EARTH HAVE
FOUR CORNERS IF
IT'S R...O...U...N....D?"
(Laughing up at the
ceiling.)
"JOHN PROBABLY
THOUGHT THE EARTH
WAS ALL FLAT.....
BUT YOU SHOULD'A
KNOWN BETTER!"

[PATIENT SIGH.]

(Giggling.)
(Shout.)
"AND YA CAN'T CHANGE IT NOW,
LORD! IT'S TOO LATE!
TOO LATE!"

[TURN TO HIS RIGHT.]
[GRUFF VOICE.]
"Nu?***
Why would I want to
CHANGE it?"

[GENTLE SMILE.]
"Because....Father...
Our beloved thinks
that You accidently
made a Big Mistake."

[GRUFF SIGH.]
"Oy vey."
[BECKON AN ANGEL
INTO THE THRONE
ROOM. THE ANGEL
IS CARRYING A BIG
BASKET OF PRAYER-MAIL.]

(Squint up at the ceiling.)
(Pause.)
(Shout.)
"WAS THIS ABOUT
THE...PRIME DIRECTIVE,
LORD? YA KNOW...
JEAN LUC PICCARD****?"

[GRUFF FROWN.]
[WAIT PATIENTLY
WHILE THE ANGEL KNEELS
IN FRONT OF THE THRONES
AND SETS THE BIG BASKET
ONTO A LITTLE GOLDEN
WORK-TABLE: SORTING
OUT THE DIFFERENT PRAYER-
SLIPS. THE ANGEL HASN'T
DONE THIS JOB BEFORE,
AND IS REALLY, REALLY SLOW.]
[SIGH.]
[SHAKING HEAD.]
[GRUFF VOICE.]
"What about him,
My precious."

"CAPTAIN PICCARD
WOULD'A PUT THE
SAME THING!
BECAUSE OF THE
PRIME DIRECTIVE!
HE WOULDN'T WANT
THE SPACE-ALIENS
TO KNOW....
WHAT THEY SHOULDN'T KNOW,
AHEAD OF....
THEIR TIME!"

[TURN TO HIS RIGHT.]
"Is Our beloved saying...
that I AM Jean Luc
PICCARD?"

[GENTLE LAUGH.]
"I believe so,
Father."

[GRUFFLY CALM
VOICE.]
"She still doesn't
know....
Who I AM."

[GENTLE SMILE.]
"No,
Father."
[TENDER VOICE.]
"I don't
think
so."
*******************
"Make it so."
{John Luc Piccard;
Captain of the U.S.S.
Enterprise. 'Star Trek:
TNT'. 1997.}




________________________
*Speaking to the Father.
**[Revelation 7:1]
***Yiddish: 'Can you
believe this?'
*****In 'Star Trek:
TNT", Captain Piccard
was always bringing up
the Prime Directive of
Intergalactic Space Policy:
if they came across a
'third-world planet'
who had a lesser
developed civilization
the officers of the space
ship were not allowed
to 'teach' them any of
their higher-technical
skills: even in good will
(i.e. using 50th Century
medical techniques to
save lives). Of course,
Piccard always gave in
and violated the Prime
Directive.

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