Christian Living

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Today was beautiful. The cool crisp air and bright sunshine, after many days of cold rain and heavy winds, must have worked wonders on the seasonal affective disorder victims in the North Country. Even though I don't mind the rain, I still enjoyed the sun. I found myself humming worship music most of the day at work. My long drive home did not detract from how much I felt God working in my life and the life of my son. I was singing at the top of my lungs to Casting Crowns when....I received a call from my son that his car was broken down next to the road about 10 miles from home. He sounded so distraught that, at first, I thought he had had an accident. Thank God that he hadn't!
Through the whole process of waiting for and following the tow truck to the station, I prayed. He ranted. Through the whole process of being overcharged and not being covered for another rental on my Triple A, I prayed. He ranted. The words I prayed were really very basic. In fact I repeated the name of the Lord so many times that, regardless of it's power, I felt like I might be bordering on a ritualistic chant. My son prayed also, between bouts of bemoaning the lack of finances to pay for repairs, how he would get to classes in the morning, and how everything goes wrong for him. I prayed through all of that and then some. He joined in when there was a break in his negative thinking and spewing.

Do I FEEL better? Not really. It's not about me or my FEELINGS anyway! It's about what an AWESOME GOD can do in our lives when we are surrendered. My son has not quite reached this point of peace yet.
But... I feel covered, protected and loved. I see the loving hand of God in this from the start of the crisis to my sitting down to type this. I see that God often addresses us in ways that require brokenness. My son said that he is sick of being broken and broke. Me too, but God has a better plan for us than these petty problems.
I have grown used to the attacks that occur whenever God is working in us. Well, maybe not used to, but at least accepting of. I choose to surrender my inabilities in general to God. I recognize the grimy hooves of the enemy in this situation, (it's so blatant and bold!), because my son was just returning from a Bible Study on campus.
I say to that stinking rag that dresses in shiny, pimp's clothing, "Get thee behind me satan! Let go of us, we will not give in!" I am speaking these words as a covering for my son who is vulnerable right now.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I toyed with allowing anger, frustration and, bitterness to begin to rule in this situation. But it wasn't a good fit. That isn't me anymore. Who God has made me is so much bigger than car issues, money issues, and my son's crisis. I find that, while I care and have compassion for his situation, I refuse to return to that person who was bullied by satan's attacks. That particular bullying technique has been thwarted in the name of Jesus Christ tonight!

I can only pray. I can only pray. Amen.

c 10/30/2006 M. LaPointe

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