Devotionals

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I don’t remember when Philippians 3:10 became my life verse actually, but at some point the words of Paul came jumping off the page of my Bible and secured themselves in my heart. And his desire became my own.

The New King James version translates it like this, “that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death.” There is so much in this one verse. I suppose one could write a powerful sermon listing all the important points. But that’s not what I want to do. I want to examine why it causes my heart to leap or tears to spring to my eyes or a yearning to groan deep in my soul.

What is it about ‘knowing’ someone that captures our interest? In Scripture, it is often used to describe an intimate relationship between husband and wife. How many of us really feel we are ‘known’ by someone else? Even the best of marriages or friendships can hide areas one doesn’t feel able to share. Some relationships don’t invite the sharing of dreams or deep emotions or fears. At any rate, I wonder if it is possible to know and be known in the deepest, most intimate sense on earth. To be completely and totally vulnerable to another human being and know our sins and our victories, our greatest fears and deepest desires are laid bare continually.

One of the most compelling reasons I responded to Jesus’ love was because I realized He knew all about me. And I didn’t bore Him or frustrate Him or disgust Him. He was delighted with me! And the things that were not so delightful? I can picture Him rolling up His sleeves now! Hard work never stopped Him. The Via Dolorosa (The Way of Suffering) never was an obstacle for Him. He would do whatever He had to in order to secure a life for His Father.

He knew me. And yet He still loved me. He died in order to satisfy His Father’s wrath against sin and obtain life after death for me. Why? The question begs an answer as to who this man is. I want to know Him.

And my first faltering steps toward Him were an effort to do just that. Who is this man who doesn’t turn away? Who is He that doesn’t look over my head when I speak to Him? Who is He that turns toward every feeble cry that rises from my heart? Who is this who is always smiling and beckoning and embracing? Who is this who never tires of teaching me truth and showing me how to dig for treasure and to search for other hidden ones who are crying out for good news too? Who is this who places Himself between me and Satan and whose face only registers rage when He is defending me from this enemy?

I want to know Him. I want to know this man who defeated death and the grave….who rose into Heaven and yet lives in my heart. I want to know this man who is preparing a home for me that I might be with Him forever and yet dwells inside this human being who sometimes neglects His presence and drops the jewel to chase the trinket. I want to know this man who grieves at my inconstant love yet woos me as if I were the most extraordinary creature in the universe.

I want to share in His sufferings. I want to believe that my pain has a purpose. I want Him to know that what He endured at His execution helps me to shoulder my own cross in faith that there is a higher and greater plan at stake.

I want to be conformed to His death. What drove Him to the cross? What was it that caused Him to look past the pain and the ignominy of it all and willingly embrace the unfairness of a criminal’s death when He could have stopped it with a word? I want to know the love that is woven into every cell and every fiber of this man. I want to see with His eyes…with His faith…with His vision.

Oh, I want to know Him. I suspect I will seek this knowledge for all eternity. Is it even possible to plumb the depths of Christ? Scarcely. And yet,it is my honor and my glory to seek to know Him in this way.

I will close with one of the most moving passages I’ve ever read. Written by one of my heroes in the faith, martyr to the Auca Indians in Ecuador in 1958 and lover of God, Jim Elliot…

“I walked out to the hill just now. It is exalting, delicious, to stand embraced by the shadows of a friendly tree with the wind tugging at your coattail and the heavens hailing your heart, to gaze and glory and give oneself again to God – what more could a man ask? Oh, the fullness, pleasure, sheer excitement of knowing God on earth! I care not if I never raise my voice again for Him , if only I may love Him, please Him. Mayhap in mercy He shall give me a host of children that I may lead them through the vast star fields to explore His delicacies whose finger ends set them to burning. But if not, if only I may see Him, touch His garments, and smile into His eyes – ah then, not stars nor children shall matter, only Himself. O Jesus, master and center and end of all, how long before that Glory is Thine which has so long waited Thee? Now there is no thought of Thee among men, then there shall be thought for nothing else. Now other men are praised, then none shall care for any other’s merits. Hasten, hasten, Glory of Heaven, take Thy crown, subdue Thy Kingdom, enthrall Thy creatures.”

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