Short Stories

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The Depth Of My Soul

In my soul I feel him. In my mind I hear him. In everything I go to do I need him. My body longs for him. Why am I going through this storm? I didn’t know eight months ago that I loved him like I do but I tell you what if he isn’t the one, I feel in my soul that he is my soul mate. I have not felt like this in a long time. When I gave up on ever meeting that Mr. Right, it just happened. He said we were together and I promised to marry him but I have no remembrance of any of it. If things happened between us its like a blur. It’s like it was washed away. I cannot tell you but it’s like I have been consumed.

I await to see him again, I want to hug him, touch him, feel him, kiss him and tell him how much I love him. This time apart hasn’t been so great but now I know that I know that Eric is my soul mate. He loves me, I love him and its not a natural love. I wait everyday with anticipation of hearing his voice. I long to see him and we get on with our lives for the Lord. We have work to do and I am ready to get busy. Where we will fellowship is another question. I really miss being at Bible Believers. I miss the people, I miss the Word being taught, and I miss the fellowship. Although I was tossed out, I still do not understand. With what I was going through I really needed my spiritual family to help hold me up one more time. My pain was so deep but no one understood. I love my husband and I believe God that he will walk out his calling in this earth. I just want to be by his side to help him; be that helpmeet that God has called me to be.

Here in Colorado, I have a lot of time to think. The mountains are so peaceful and they accept the rain, the snow or just dry weather. I must also weather the storm. Hurricanes come as well as tornadoes but with tornadoes there is terrain to walk through but not as much damage as a hurricane. We have things in our lives that we are ashamed of. Andre wanted me back but he was not what I wanted. I just wanted to hurt him like he had hurt me. I told Andre that I was with Eric and I wanted him in my life. I wanted him to see how it felt to be with somebody and they just leave you. He left me home many nights to go and be with his girlfriend and expected me as a Christian to welcome him home again with open arms. During our marriage he spent more nights away than at home. Of course he was always there to escort me to church. I should not have made him think I wanted him back when I did not. God I am so sorry for the deception.

I wish that all will be forgiven. I went on to marry Eric when he came back. We went and got Eric’s key from Andre that he had taken off my dresser. Andre promised me that he was going to kill me. He said that I was not suppose to be with no one other than him after four years of being divorced. He is evil and thank God for my new husband. I will never be married to another man other than Eric.

Although many think that I do not love Eric, I do. I never knew that he was around me because he wanted to marry me. We were friends, brother and sister. We had other people around us all the time. Women we are to feel this way about our husbands and they should feel the same towards God. It's time we set things in order, Jesus is soon to return and he won't have anything out of order. Let's get it together now.

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