Short Stories

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Jared Yates had been around the proverbial block a time or two. Earlier in the decade, Jared enjoyed the sweet fruits of self-employment. His metier was the running an internet-based business selling sports collectibles that began as a hobby during the late 1990's but had unexpectedly blossomed into a full-time job by 2001. It was indeed the American Dream come true, and he was keenly aware of how he had been blessed, as this collectibles endeavor provided a very good income, allowing Jared to quit his job as a supervisor in a retail store.

Jared spent the final months of the Carter, all of the Reagan, all of Bush 41, and nearly all of the Clinton administrations as a rock-n-roll singer, guitarist, and songwriter. The bands that he would play in would come and go as the club dates blurred together in a series of stale beer, vomit, and cigarette smoke odored vignettes -- replete with audiences raising Molson bottles on high to exacerbate the sloppiness of the slurred requests for "Free Bird." Not a single one of Jared's bands ever performed Free Bird, as they were Cheap Trick influenced power-pop groups that featured his original songs.

The fact that his bands didn't play Classic Rock cover tunes would occasionally place the safety of Jared and his band mates into jeopardy in certain roadhouse dives they would get booked to play. In November of 1993, a watering hole named Jimmy Joe's was the preferred hangout of a 6'4" tall, 270 lb. biker called "Crankshaft Eddie" by his close associates. When Jared's band The Groove Clowns wouldn't play the Rolling Stones classic Jumpin' Jack Flash - Eddie smashed his cue stick on the bistro's billiards table and ran at the stage with the jagged end of the broken handle of the stick; with the intent of maiming or killing the first musician that he could connect with.

Unfortunately for Crankshaft Eddie, his alcohol-fueled rage did not allow for light stepping, causing him to trip on the way toward the stage, falling short of his goal and onto the sharp end of the broken cue stick, forcing it through his Harley Davidson t-shirt and into his belly at a point between his breastbone and navel. Eddie then pushed himself up onto his knees -- the cue stick being firmly embedded into his core.

Crankshaft Eddie's eyes registered confusion as the Clowns played Jared's song "It's Alright." A well-meaning friend of the big man ran to his aid and began pulling on the cue stick, as the other 15 or so Jimmy Joe's patrons looked on in horror. The friend succeeded in pulling the cue stick free, and with it a few feet of small intestine that was stuck to the wooden billiard tool, looking not unlike spaghetti and marinara. The friend, known only as Tino, began to panic and attempted to pull the cue stick free of the entrails, which only resulted in two more feet of the organ being unceremoniously yanked from the wound in Crankshaft Eddie's midsection. Tino's brown eyes were wide with fright as he dropped the stick and guts and repeatedly yelled "Holy @#%#" as he ran for the drinking establishment's front door, leaving his injured friend behind. Crankshaft Eddie himself began staggering toward the front door, appearing almost comical with his 5 and a half feet of stinking innards attached to two feet of broken cue stick dragging behind him.

The pain of the abdominal trauma was barely penetrating Crankshaft Eddie's drugged and pickled brain through the shock, and yet he was cognizant enough to know that he might need medical attention. The band played on while a tall, muscular fellow with a shaved head and Fu Manchu mustache sat at the bar and remarked, "dude, that took guts" as the shocked, injured man staggered by toward the door. "Ooooh, gross" was all his skinny blonde 17 year old girlfriend who sat to his left could offer. The bartender, who resembled Santa Clause sans red suit, interjected "maybe I oughta call 911, huh? I think that dude might be seriously messed up. But man, I can't keep the cops comin' here. I think I got some underagers drinkin' in here, and I'll get shut down." When EMS did finally arrive, they found big, mean Crankshaft Eddie dead in the doorway, having died of cardiac arrest brought on by the shock of his injury and blood loss -- his already compromised and over-taxed heart merely surrendering without much of a fight.

The day jobs (as well as a couple of Graveyard Shift stints) came and went as Jared pursued the fame and fortune of the Rock-N-Roll Dream. The lousy gigs in dumps like Jimmy Joe's didn't offer much money either, but the Groove Clowns were able to self-release a CD in May of 1994, after many rejections and less than good faith overtures from record labels. The studio time used to record the Groove Clowns album was the grand prize awarded to the group for winning the January '94 Battle of the Bands held at the Gold Mug, a popular nightspot located Seneca Knolls, a northern suburb of Syracuse New York, the city from which the Clowns hailed.

The Groove Clowns lone CD project was received positively by the regional music press, but the good reviews did not boost sales. Acrimony and apathy had begun to seep in around the edges of the band. Additionally, Jared was gaining an increasing distaste for the club scene. He had recently given up imbibing in alcohol and did not smoke and couldn't stand inhaling it second-hand. Being in that element of vices was wearing hard on Jared. The lack of good bookings became discouraging and the artistic differences within the band were now rearing their ugly heads. By October of 1994, the Groove Clowns were no more, defunct a mere nine months after the winning the Battle of the Bands that made their CD release a reality.

The coffee house scene would be a better fit for Jared Yates, who was performing as an acoustic soloist by the autumn of 1995, having gotten married earlier that year. A steady gig came out of his change in musical direction, that being an 18 month long stint of Tuesday nights at Grinder's Corner Cafe' in Fayetteville, New York. Other coffee houses in upstate New York became venues for Jared, as did area bookstores.

Jared's songwriting began to take on political overtones; right-leaning and not the left-wing material that one would expect from a member of the music industry. Jared now promoted himself as the "Psychedelic Conservative." The music itself still evidenced the Beatle-like chord changes and melodies, but lyrically he was espousing themes of family, personal responsibility, free enterprise, gun rights, and limited government. During this time of musical metamorphosis, something began to tug at Jared's spirit, something profound that he couldn't put a finger on...

In the spring of 1996, Jared released a cassette-only album titled "Position." This was a stripped-down project, featuring only Jared's voice and guitars -- just as he would be performing live. The album was roundly trashed in the media, partly because its production was bare-bones and mainly because of the conservative political messages that permeated most of the songs. Despite its rejection by the very same media that applauded the Groove Clowns, the "Position" cassette garnered better sales numbers than the release by Jared's erstwhile band.

That same weariness following the release of the Groove Clowns CD -- that same heavy feeling of burnout -- was again overtaking Jared in 1998. At the same time that he was embarking upon his solo career, his love of sports was leading him into the collecting and selling of rare sports memorabilia. By 1998, this love for collectibles associated with professional and collegiate sports was becoming a passion that was exceeding Jared's desire to make music. In March of that year, after playing a lunchtime gig at a gift shop on the Syracuse University campus, Jared told his wife Jocelyn that he was done making music on a serious level. "I'm really sick of it" he told her. "I'm sick of the scene, I'm sick of the apathetic audiences, and I'm sick of chasing the dream. It's been way too many years. I'm trying to turn my sports collectibles hobby into a business and I'm on fire to do that. The collectibles are for more enjoyable than playing music now." Jocelyn's reply was "I'm sick of seeing you tormented over this musical pursuit. I think getting out of it is a good idea."

It was then a part-time business, but Jared poured himself into the sports endeavor when he wasn't at his day job, the very same way he had poured himself into music for so many years. In addition to this passion for sports collectibles, there was something else tugging at Jared. He was being pulled toward something that he thought he already had and already knew, but that was not the case.

By early 1999, Jared's collectibles business provided a nice part-time income and the desire to play music in public was dead. It was then that his mother in law recommended that he read a Christian-oriented novel titled "Left Behind." This fiction series describes the Rapture of the Christian church and End Times events in a manner that they will very likely transpire in reality.

Jared was avidly reading the first book of the series and it was about halfway into that book that he came to the realization of what this thing was that had been gently but firmly tugging at him over the past several years -- that "thing" was the Holy Spirit. Jared had been calling himself a Christian but in fact he hadn't been born again. It was then, while being immersed in the first Left Behind book, that Jared felt moved to confess that he was a sinner and to ask Jesus to be the his Savior and the Lord of his life. It all came together after years of gentle yet deliberate leading by the Holy Spirit. Jared now knew that there was one way, one truth, and one life, and it was through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Jared now knew that God was not some cosmic puffball who stood by and watched the world turn. He now knew of the ultimate Holiness and power of our creator, the one God who exists in three parts: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Jared's faith was now real and he slowly but deliberately over the weeks and months began to live it out. His interest in the End Times became keen and he began to see how events were lining up in the world around him.

In late September of 2000, Jared and Jocelyn's daughter Celine was born. Jocelyn's labor was nearly 24 hours long and Celine's arrival into this world was bumpy, being that she was "sunny side up" and eventually had to be berthed through emergency C-section after traditional methods failed. Celine was a beautiful baby who turned out normal, happy, and healthy. Celine had the face of an angel.

In August of 2001, Jared decided that his online collectibles business was generating enough money in sales that he could truly live the dream and do it as his living. Long gone was the desire to make it in the music business. He had made it big in not so many words, as he was now self-employed and very well known and highly respected and trusted in the sports memorabilia milieu. This was a blessing from the Lord for which Jared could not give enough thanks; and yet this was a very precarious manner in which to earn a living, as the economy and other factors would hold great sway over a business selling expensive gewgaws that are not necessary for survival.

Fast-forward to 2006. The sports collectibles business was still supporting Jared and he was the primary breadwinner of the family. Still, Jared had the sense that this business may have already scaled the heights and reached the pinnacle of its success. The business was not affected by the temporary economic letdown following the terror attacks of September 11th, 2001. The economy was doing well under George Bush, but the competition in the sports collectibles business was growing as high-income earners like doctors and lawyers were throwing their money in not as collectors but now as dealers themselves on a part-time basis -- just "for fun." The very same individuals who made Jared's business take off by being good customers were now becoming his competitors. It was just a game for these gentlemen and they had the greenbacks to play it well. But, what these new players lacked was Jared's product knowledge, honesty, integrity, and customer service. It was those assets that allowed Jared to remain competitive in an increasingly crowded sports collectibles field.

On a cold, cloudy day in October of 2006, Jared was typing his response to an e-mail received concerning a particular item listed for sale on his website. There was a bit of stress dogging him, as the pressures were growing in a business where there were now too many competitors, saturating the marketplace and dulling the demand for the product while at the same time increasing the cost at the wholesale level. Not everyone in this game was going to make it to the final gun. As Jared began to type his response to the query of the potential customer, a gentle but forceful voice that was not his own spoke in his soul and said...

"...You will make music again. You will do it for me and you will begin now!"

Jared was stunned. There was no mistaking the voice of the Holy Spirit. He was given a command by the Alpha and Omega, the Beginning and the End. Jared clicked "send" on the reply that he had been working on, and chances were good that his response was not completed!

Over in a back corner of his home office, leaning against the wall was the black soft-shell case containing his acoustic guitar, neglected like an old friend that for whatever reason we deliberately decide to cease contact with. We stop both taking his calls and making calls to him. Time moves on and we drift apart -- and it can be heart-wrenching when given a modicum of thought. Jared walked over to the case and opened it. He grabbed the neck of the six string and spoke to it as if it would understand: "C'mon out, old friend. We have a job to do."

As 2006 folded into 2007, the business still kept Jared busy, but not to the extent that it did just two years prior. The sales volume was diminishing and merchandise to sell was getting tougher to come by. But now there were recording sessions. Yes, it was true, a new CD was in the works from the formerly retired singer/songwriter who not long ago was quite sure that he would never make music again. Jared had been following through on what the Holy Spirit had inspired in him and had written songs that sing praise to the Lord and evangelize on His behalf. Jared and his friend and producer Randy Allen were playing all of the instruments on the tracks, with Jared of course handling the vocal duties. The sound would be familiar to anyone who had followed Jared's music in the past: Beatles and Cheap Trick influenced power-pop and rock. But, the lyrical style was different now. The lyrics existed to spread the good news of the Gospel and to ready people for the imminent return of Christ to take to Heaven His believers.

The CD "Tears of Joy" was released in October of 2007. Unlike his last musical release 11 years prior, Jared had the power of the internet to promote his music, and it led to loads of play in places like Russia, India, and the Philippines. A small number of Christian radio stations also gave the CD airtime. The message was simple and it was designed to save and it got beamed all over the globe. But, as is the fate of so many independent artists, the sales of the "Tears Of Joy" CD did not meet expectations, despite the worldwide internet play as well as over the air radio promotion. Still, it was a good record and gave Jared the confidence to keep moving forward.

If there was any doubt before, it was now official: Jared the singer, songwriter, and recording artist had un-retired!

The live concerts were not plentiful for Jared. It was more difficult to book in Christian venues than nightclubs and that fact weighed heavily on him. Jared would play both as a soloist and with a band -- depending on the venue. He was eager and hungry and the Holy Spirit was there to encourage. The collectibles business was still his living, although it was deteriorating steadily, a variety of reasons being the blame.

The manner in which the Holy Spirit first commanded Jared to make music again made the artist believe that big things were in store. Although the spring of 2008 brought musical promise, those "big things" never materialized. Jared was writing more songs and thinking about the next CD. Jared was always busy -- fighting to stay self-employed through the slowly dying collectibles business while at the same time fighting to turn his music into his new self-employment. He was struggling to carry out the evangelical music mission that he believed God set him on. His relationship with Jocelyn was deteriorating. She did not share his faith in Jesus Christ; he coming to faith after their marriage. They were not a "match made in Heaven" at this point and both were thinking that perhaps they never were. They did not enjoy each other's company as they had very little in common. Jocelyn was very dissatisfied with Jared. Jared would go with the flow to keep the peace. He would keep this thing together for the sake of beautiful Celine, who had blossomed into a bright, articulate, and creative 8 year old.

As the summer of 2008 gave way to Autum, the collectibles business was hurting badly. Jared was prayerful that perhaps the next CD would break his career open so he could just pull the plug on that business and put it out of its misery. He believed strongly that making music was what God created him to do. And now, short stories and blogs were being added into the mix, demonstrating that the Lord had blessed Jared with multiple talents. Jared had believed that God wanted this multi-pronged creative attack to be his bread and butter, while more importantly spreading God's word. So far, there wasn't much bread and butter resulting from Jared's hard work, persistence, and devotion.

On a Saturday afternoon in late October of '08, Jocelyn told Jared that it was over. After a particularly heated argument which involved members of their extended family, Jocelyn stated that she wanted a divorce and had in fact wanted it for a few years. The two agreed that they would wait until after Christmas to get the legal proceedings under way, but Celine would have to be told soon that Daddy would eventually be moving away. When she was told just before Thanksgiving, Celine cried briefly but recovered quickly -- at least on the surface. All in all, it was a very sad state of affairs. Jared and Jocelyn had probably stopped loving each other long before now.

Jared moved in with his soon to be divorced buddy Rick during the first week of May, 2009. The proceedings between Jared and Jocelyn were just about wrapped up and all was amicable. Jared would see Celine very often and she'd stay with him every other weekend. Amidst all the turmoil, a new 6 song E.P. CD was about to be released, titled "He's Coming Soon."

The events that transpired were very similar to the previous CD release. Internet radio airplay all over the world. Plenty of interest in Russia and the Philippines. Lots of kudos such as "nice work, Jared." But, ultimately, very slow sales. The economy was in a shambles. The collectibles business was barely hanging on and it begged to be put out of its misery.

Jared was lonely and struggling. He missed not seeing Celine every day but understood that if he got out on the road, that's how it would be. Things had not worked out as he believed that they would, but he had faith that it was a matter of God's divine timing and that this dogs's day would come and this process would change. There was plenty of talk, a great deal of ideas, and a ton of creativity being poured forth. Standing at the edge of a huge momentum shift is difficult when you can't get over the threshold. There were people that believed that God was using Jared right where he was and Jared believed it as well, but he needed bolstering and filling. He had friends that were working with him musically and they were his brothers as well. And yet, things in his corner of this earth were tumbling down around him. It was all of this that he thought about as he drifted off to sleep that night. Ah....precious sleep.....

...There are grey clouds here and it's a bit foggy. It reminds Jared of an early morning in the summer after an all-night rain. "Hmmmm" he says to himself. "Is this a dream, because these clouds are moist? I can feel them."

He senses a presence to his left, in his peripheral vision he sees an arm and a hand reaching out of the clouds. It's female, he knows this now. She has on what appears to be a silver-colored dress as he can see the sleeve now. He sees and feels her right hand take his left hand. "If this is a dream, I'd give it an A plus for realism" Jared says to himself. He feels the warmth of her hand and the moisture of the clouds. It's not unlike a steamy bathroom after a shower...

The female asks Jared "are you OK?" "Yea, I think so" he answers her. "What's going on here?"

"C'mon, let's go. I need to show you some things" she says. She's still holding his hand and now he has the distinct impression that they are slowly flying. The clouds are beginning to dissipate as they fly forward and sunlight is working its way in.

"I've been a little bit worried about you these days" she says as the thinning clouds float past, looking more like steam now. Jared can't speak but he tries. He can see her better now, but not her face as he is a bit behind her as she pulls him along. She's wearing a silver colored dress that is not unlike something an angel would wear, but she has no wings. She has long brown hair that is fluttering in the warm, comfortable breeze. "She's about 16 years old" Jared thinks to himself.

There's a blue, sunny sky now, with just a few clouds. "It's a nice day" Jared thinks to himself. There is so much he'd like to say but his voice just won't work. Then the girl says "look down there."

While it's obviously summer up where they are flying, there's snow on the ground below. It's early morning up high, but it appears to be late afternoon down there where a young woman walks alone. She is wearing a heavy blue nylon zip-up jacket, a dark knit hat and blue gloves. Jared can't see her feet. She's got a black backpack on and she's moving slowly on a nine foot wide path. She's sad and scared. She's having a rough time in her life and she needs a real friend. What she's about to discover is that there are four brand new friends a little further up the path.

Jared finds that scene familiar, but what is it? Then the young flying tour guide asks "Would you like to see some other stuff?" Jared can speak in a croaky voice now and replies "yes."

There is a place like that which the winter-clad woman was just walking, but it's a summer scene now, with a narrow, straight body of water, a similar walking path and lots of trees and greenery. Out of the water leaps a Northern Pike that would measure about 4 feet long. Oh, this is so familiar to Jared and yet it isn't. The girl who is pulling him through the air asks "Wouldn't you love to hook onto that whopper?" "Yes I would" croaks Jared. "Well, he'd hit a brown, jointed Jitterbug toward evening" the girl answers matter of factly. Jared is amazed that this young lady knows a thing or two about fishing!

Jared finds something familiar in her voice and manner of speaking, and yet he's never heard it before. He is thinking that this entire event is bizarre and very calming, all at the same time. He also believes that this trip through the air is not a dream.

"You gotta keep watching down there. You really gotta!" the young tour guide implores Jared excitedly, with a bit of a giggle in her voice. He wishes that he could see her face.

Jared sees himself and Celine now, standing next to that same 50 foot wide body of water, only this time it's a different location, under a bridge. Celine has a very big fish hooked, and the then 6 year old girl can't reel it in by herself. She hands the fishing rod to an anxious Jared and shouts "you do it!" The cover of the cheap spincast reel pops off under the strain of the 7 pound Largemouth Bass that grabbed the small piece of nightcrawler that Celine was using as bait to catch Pumpkinseeds and Bluegills. Jared recalled grabbing the jaw of that big bass and hoisting it out of the water as Celine's eyes bugged with amazement. "What a wonderful memory" Jared spoke as he realized that a tear was trickling out of his right eye. "Yup, that one was a monster. He was probably trying to feed on the sunfish" the young tour guide spoke knowingly.

"Isn't it relaxing looking down there?" the girl then asked Jared. "Take it all in. Don't miss a second." Below them were green pastures set amongst oaks, birches, and pine groves. There were parks that Jared had been to with Celine and Jocelyn in recent years past. He could see the paths that he would walk behind the house where he lived before he was divorced, the paths that hosted his "prayer walks."

What a beautiful ride. What a breathtaking sky. "This is what I really want you to see" spoke the girl as she pointed down to a large grassy hill that was surrounded by trees of all sorts with leaves of all colors. It could have been an autumnal scene but Jared sensed not. The hill was perhaps two acres wide at the top with lush green grass. There was a larger hill behind it, covered with pine trees.

The hill had people standing all over it, sort of like they may have been gathered and staged for a photo shoot. All at once, they looked up and waved at Jared and the girl as the two hovered overhead. These were men and women and a small number of children. What was most fascinating was the skin collideascope. They were many different races. Many looked to have been Polynesian. Some were Asian and others Indian. Some had round cheekbones, brown hair and green eyes; giving the impression of being from Russia or the former Satellites. There were blacks and whites. There were so many represented and there could have been thousands, it was hard to tell.

The girl asked "do you see them all?"

"Wow, that's a lot of people and they're waving to us" Jared answered the girl as he smiled and waved back.

"They just wanted to say 'thank you'" the girl tour guide told Jared.

Jared retorted with "thank you? To me? Why?"

The girl replied "because every single one of them accepted Jesus because of something that they heard in your music, Daddy."

Jared was stunned and a little confused by what he heard from the girl. It was then that he turned and saw her face. It was his Celine. She was older, about 16 like he had guessed, but it was indeed the daughter that he loved with every ounce of his being. Jared asked "Dolly, (his nickname for her) are you OK?" "Shhhh, now listen to me" was Celine's response.

"I'm worried about you, Daddy. You need to rest. You are going too hard and it isn't good for you. You need to stop worrying about all that isn't happening and rejoice in what is. You saw all those people. There are more that you can touch for the Lord, but not if you're sick and broken. God wants you to be strong and healthy. I need you to be strong and healthy. You need sleep. You need to trust in Him as much as you tell others to trust him!"

"God had to get your attention. He wanted to reassure you and encourage you. He knew that the way things are for you right now, the only time you'd listen to Him would be when you are sleeping and can't be distracted by all of your waking concerns. He loves you more than any of us can fathom and wants you to keep creating for Him, so don't despair. He wants you to hang on and wait for Him. He will not leave you dry."

"I'm OK. I'm still 9 years old, just like you know me to be. I only appeared older in here. I'm home in my bed and I wish that you were home in that house with me, but I understand now. I know that you love me and I'm so glad when we spend time together, even if it's just watching T.V. I love it when we go and play with the puppies at the pet store.

"I love you, Daddy. God loves you. And I think that way, way, down, deep inside, Mommy still does too. You need to rest, so sleep now."

"Please...do it for me."

"Goodnight, Daddy."

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