Jeffrey, you are a very good writer. This caught my attention from the start (I can remember "cleaning up" my room exactly the same as you, although I was an Archie girl).
You not only caught my attention at the start, but you held it to the end. (And what an end!) Your message was clear and very strong, while appealing to the reader in a very relational way that kept them connected.
I related all too well with this: "I get a little exasperated with Godâ€™s methodology, impatient for the rush of knowing Iâ€™m doing something significant.
As for your ending, the last two sentences were perfect. They wrapped the message up in the most excellent way. Well done.
The only very minor critique would be to possibly break up that third paragraph a little. (VERY minor thing.)
Keep shining His light through your writing. Deb (FaithWriters.com)