Bible Studies

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I remember
the devotion
of your youth,
your love
as a bride,
how you
followed Me
in the
wilderness.
[Jeremiah 2:2]
********************
"Am I RELATED...
to him,
Lord?"

"Who,
child."

"JEREMIAH?"

[CHUCKLE..]

"I bet....he WAS:
always mopey,
and sad,
and kvetchy,
about HIMSELF?"

[SMILING.]

(Nod at the ceiling.)
"Yeah;
I mean...BOTH
of us had Jewish
PARENTS."
(Laugh!)
"We GOTTA be
RELATED."

[PATIENT GAZE
UPON CHILD,
IN FRUMPY PINK BATHROBE.]

(Munch on a piece
of celery smothered
in sour cream, and
Walmart honey-french
dressing*.)
"Ya know,
we started reading..
'Jeremiah',
tonight."

[SMILE.]
"Yes,
child."
[TENDER VOICE.]
"I know."

(Squint.)
"It's kind of WEIRD;
like, You're the SAME
GOD who was TALKIN'
to him.....in that BOOK?"
(Grimmace.)
"That's, like.....
too WEIRD."

[LAUGH.]

(Thoughtful squint.)
"That's, like...
really WEIRD."
(Close eyes.)
(Shake head.)
"Neah;
that's just too weird.
ForGET it."

[SMILING!]

"Yeah; that was all...
BEFORE...You got
tired of the JEWS,
and broke OFF....
and,
became a GENTILE."

[BURST OF LAUGHTER
FROM THE THRONE
TO THE RIGHT.]

(Stare up at the ceiling.)
(Curious tone of
a psychotherapist,
leaning forward to
hear the whole story.)
"So.....what HAPPENED
with THAT?"
(Lean back in the chair.)
"You even told PETER...
to stop being KOSHER**...
I don't UNDERSTAND?
How come Ya wanted
to stop being JEWISH?"

[WIPING TEARS
OF LAUGHTER FROM
EYES.]

"I don't GET it."
(Philosophical squint.)
"And....then,
all this division-and-
MULTIPLICATION
business...."

[BURST OF LAUGHTER!]

(Squint eyes shut.)
"You're ONE;
then....all a'sudden,
You're THREE....."
(Rueful grimmace.)
"It's all very WEIRD."

[SMILE.]
"I understand,
Mein kin'der."

"Yeah....well....
I'm glad,
SOMEBODY does."

[SMILING!]

"Ya know.....
the JEWS still haven't
eh....picked UP, on that
whole....."
(Dramatic wave of the hand.)
"....MULTIPLICATION-
BUSINESS..."

[NODDING.]

"Except...for just a
FEW of us...who are
just NEUROTIC enough..."

"Who
made you,
child?"

(Dramatic pause.)
(Look up.)
"The SAME One
Who ....made,
JEREMIAH?"

[NOD.]

(Sigh.)
"That's what I'm
AFRAID of,
Lord."

[LAUGH!]

"Oy vey 'z mir.
dachen'ze' ...PUN'NUM***,
THAT one had!
Was he ever...HAPPY?"

"Yes,
My child."
[TENDER GAZE.]
"When,
he saw
Me."
**********************
You know
the word
which he sent
to Israel,
preaching
good news
of peace
by Jesus Christ..
how God
anointed
Jesus of Nazareth
with
the Holy Spirit.
[Acts 10:36-38]

____________________
*It's not Catalina,
but it's a little
cheaper. It's actually
pretty good.
**Acts 10:9-16.
***Yiddish: 'Sad, or
mopey face'; 'face like
a pill'.

To Denise's
Precept Class.

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