Holidays

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About the
middle
of the feast,
Jesus went up
into the temple,
and taught.
[John 7:14]
***********************
"I hate this time
of year, Lord."

[LOVING GAZE.]
"I know,
My child."

(Look up, squeamishly.)
"No OFFENSE,
or nothin'."

[PATIENT NODDING.]
[WISE LOOK.]

"It's just.....these
PARKING LOTS!
OY VEY!"

[NODDING.]

"And....the TRAFFIC!
OY!"

[SOLEMN NOD.]
[GLANCE TO THE RIGHT.]
[SMILE.]

"And.....WALMART!"
(Shaking head,
irritably.)
"It's like.....
these PEOPLE
just came from ...
SIBERIA*!...
....And....SUDDENLY,
figured out that
WALMARTS, even,
EXISTED!
Oy!"

[GAZE UPON
IRRITABLE CHILD
OPENING UP
A GROCERY BAG.]

(Irritable snort.)
"They were even
outta my favorite..
LITTER!"
(Glare up at the ceiling.)
"What are these people
DOING: buying Christmas
KITTY LITTER?"

[PATIENT SIGH.]

(Cranky voice.)
"YOU don't REALLY..
understand what I'm
TALKIN' about....DO YOU,
LORD?"

[CURIOUS LOOK.]
"Why,
My child?"

"Well......"
(Squirm.)
(Squint.)
"Ya KNOW:
bein' Up THERE,
and, all."

[CHUCKLE.]

"Ya know.....
and,
naturally....
they didn't HAVE
parking lots: in Your DAY."

[BURST OUT LAUGHING!]

"And....Ya know:
'Walmart'..was still
a figment of Your Imagination."

[SIGH.]
[SHAKING HEAD,
PATIENTLY.]

"I mean,
all those people,
in Your day,
went to the MARKET,
and all....but..."

[PATIENT VOICE.]
"But
what,
Mein kin'der."

"They didn't have
to deal with the PARKING."
(Thoughtful squint.)
"Although....
maybe, they had to
fight to get a stall-spot,
for their DONKEYS?"

[BURST OF LAUGHTER,
FROM THE RIGHT SIDE
OF THE THRONE.]

(Shout to the ceiling.)
"WHO'S UP THERE,
WITH Ya, LORD?"

"Read My Word,
child.
Read My Word."
**********************
The Jews
marveled at it,
saying,
How is it
that this man
has learning,
when
he has never
studied?
So Jesus
answered them,
My teaching
is not mine,
but his
who sent
me.
[John 7:15-16]

_____________________________
*No offense to
people from Siberia;
my family's from Russia,
too. They were slovenly Jews,
so they got sent to Siberia, a lot.

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