Christian Living

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On that cursed evening I dared to ask my father, “Father, give me the share of the property that will belong to me.” What is my property? Is it because I was born of him? My eyes were blind as I had been thinking only about my friends and enjoyment.

He coaxed with me with his affection. But I was too blind to see things. I was thinking that I had grown up now and no more a child. Only a child needs more than ever the presence and guidance of a father. I know science has documented that the vital role of a father is essential in the formative years of childhood. But now I am a grown up. I do not need a father.

I rejected all the requests of my father and insisted going away from him. He had no other go. He divided the property and gave me my due.

There were a few days when I could have realized my blunder. But my selfishness and itching ego did not allow me to open my conscience an see. I gathered all I had and traveled to a distant country, and there I squandered all I had in dissolute living. Oh, what an illusionary pleasure!

Nothing gave me satisfaction. I went from one thing to another on and on. But nowhere I has a full satisfaction. My eyes craved for more sensuous. My nose sniffed for more sensational. My tongue was tantalized. My ears longed for more melodious. My body yearned for more and more. I squandered everything.

When I had spent everything, things began to change. A severe famine had taken place throughout the country I stayed. There is a South Indian proverb which became true in my case. “The place where a sinner goes is the hell”. I was n need. In need of everything.

I even went and hire myself out to one o the citizens of that country. I was not a citizen there. I went there for my lavish enjoyment. I was sent to feed his pigs. What could be worse than this job? Hunger was eating me up and I had no shame. I remembered Adam after his eating the fruit of Eden garden.

I would gladly have filled myself with the pods that the pigs were eating. And no one gave me anything. I came to myself.

I longed for my childhood. My father’s house having enough and more!

I thought I was wise when I grew up old. But it was otherwise. I recollected the words of wise people. “This is what the Lord says: ‘Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom or the strong man boast of his strength or the rich man boast of his riches, but let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight,’ declares the Lord.” (Jeremiah 9:23-24)

“As a mother comforts her child, so I will comfort you” (Isaiah 66:13). “Can a woman forget her nursing child?” (Isaiah 49:15)

Only after a long time I could realize the void of my father. I understood the meaning of the words, “If the child asks for bread, will you give a stone? Or if the child asks for a fish, will give a snake? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” (Matthew 7: 9-10)

Oh, Father, I should not have done that I should have always been your child. I should not have left you. But Father, I should come back to you. If not as your child, accept me at least as your servant.. Make me a child. Is it for that Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it” ?

Oh Father, I am unworthy to call you as Father. You have been so loving. You have been a prodigal Father in loving me. But I have come a long way you as a grown up. Now I want to be your child. I want you to be my Father for ever.

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