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Topic: Resolutions (12/29/03)
TITLE: Isabell's Resolution
By Michael Dellosso
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Jan sighed deeply and clicked on the television. This was not exactly the life she had envisioned. Picking up after three kids, ending every day feeling haggard and weary—is this all there was to life? Some of her friends had fulfilling careers and seemed so content and happy. They always looked “put together” and acted so cheery and chipper. It made Jan sick; her “job” was very unrewarding and sitting around in sweats and a t-shirt was hardly what she considered “put together.” And lately she felt as if no one noticed what she did all day, or even cared.
Her spiritual life was suffering, too. She hadn’t cracked the Bible in weeks and often found herself struggling with becoming irritated with the girls. Oh, she knew it wasn’t their fault. They were kids and kids will be kids. But the fatigue of being a mommy and the constant berating she dished herself for not being a better mommy had brought her to the point where she was ready to give up.
Jan flipped through the channels and paused at a talk show. The host was going on about New Year’s resolutions and doing something meaningful and fulfilling this year.
“Hmph,” Jan snorted to herself, “I know what my resolution is . . . learn how to be a real mommy.”
Just then her four-year-old, Isabell, climbed up on the sofa and wrapped her arms around Jan’s neck.
“Mommy,” she said, her endless blue eyes growing wide, “do you know what my New Year’s relosution is?”
“What?” Jan said in an uninterested, monotone voice.
Isabell cupped Jan’s face in her tiny hands. “I want to be just like you, the best mommy in the world!”