Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Foreign Language (12/09/10)
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TITLE: Adorabubble Prom-isk | Previous Challenge Entry
By Beth Muehlhausen
12/15/10 -
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“Mommymommymommy! Breck-kiss time! Simanin-sugar on toast! And chokit molk!”
“But I’ve already started to spread jam …”
“Nooooo! SIMANIN!”
“Strawberry jam it is, period, and you’re NOT having chocolate milk for breakfast!”
“But … but …don’t like starberry jam … and lasterday you said …”
“No more fussing, young man. Strawberry is what you’re getting. Yesterday I said nothing about his morning’s breakfast. Now eat this so we can get you dressed.”
“Don’t want dressed. Like jamamas.”
“You can’t wear pajamas all day.”
“Then bathing soup.”
“Nope. Not your bathing suit, either. Not to preschool.”
“Why not?”
“Because I said so. Now eat your toast.”
“Don’t like skewel.”
“Eat!”
“Cows don’t eat toast with starberry jam.”
“What do COWS have to do with YOU? Would you prefer GRASS for breakfast?”
“No. Spesketti.”
“Spaghetti isn’t an option.”
“Then macka-noni-tees.”
“Nope. No macaroni and cheese, either. Now stop stalling and EAT! Here – I’m going to help you.”
“STOP IT MAMA! Me dude it MINE OWN SELF!”
“HEY YOUNG MAN! You’ve got to learn to obey your Mama … and this baby talk has to stop! It sounds like you’re speaking a foreign language!”
“But me am not free yet, Mama.”
“Almost-three is old enough to speak clearly. We just need to practice a little more often. Now eat your toast.”
“Want to get the chicken pops, like Jake, and stay home.”
“Child!”
“Jake has a cool nake, Mama. He lives in a queer air-ee-um.”
“I’m not interested in Jake’s chicken pox, his snake, or his acquarium. I’m interested in you eating your breakfast!”
“Some cold slob?”
“You’ve got to be kidding. What is the matter with you this morning? You never eat cole slaw! This little game has gone too far …”
“Don’t like starberry jam – it’s mascusting.”
“Disgusting, huh? Well, I’ll show you what’s disgusting. Your attitude is becoming disgusting, and we’re headed to the bathroom with the wooden spoon if you don’t finish that toast by the time I count to ten.”
“But it’s MASCUSTING!”
“One …”
“Want to go look in the frig-da-day-dor … !”
“Two …”
“Mama!”
“Three …”
“But you said I’m adorabubble, Mama!”
“You’re NOT adorable now. Four …”
“Like when I point my insect finger … and do a dance … you say I’m adorabubble …”
“Your index finger-pointing was cute last night when we were looking at stars, but not now! EAT! Five …”
“But that starberry is all rotnin!”
“That is perfectly good jam. It is not rotten, and you know it. Six …”
“Want to go help daddy with the mawn lower!”
“Seven …”
“Want to go to the lieberry!”
“No lawn mower. No library! Eight …”
“Want ice cream … no, a pock-lick-ul!”
“POPSICLE! You’re about to get a spanking!”
“Noooooo! Jus’ scrape off the starberry and put on simanin, Mama!”
“Young man. If I do as you ask, will you eat your toast? With no more complaining?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Really and truly?”
“Uh-huh.”
“All right then. Cinnamon-sugar wins this time. Here.”
“Simanin. Sank you, Mama.”
“I’m glad you’re happy. But you’d better hurry up. I’m up to nine …”
“Me make my toast dispa-hear, Mama! See?”
“Disappearing toast. Imagine that. And all before I can say ‘ten!’”
“Yeah. Like Cookie Monster. Mmm-um-ummm-mum …”
“You are about to drive me crazy – do you know that?”
“Sank you for my breck-kiss, Mama.”
“Goodness - after all that fussing! You CAN be polite when you want.”
“Skoos me now, Mama? I all done.”
“You’re excused.”
“Me is adorabubble.”
“I suppose so.”
“You adorabubble too, Mama.”
“Thank you, honey.”
“Welk-some.”
“Now let’s get ready for school!”
“Okay – if I can take my nockulators and lellow bulella …”
“Whatever you say. Binoculars and a yellow umbrella will be just fine companions for such an adorable little boy - although we’ll probably leave them in the car.”
“Then after skewel can I have chokit molk?”
“Yes, you can. In fact, we adorable people – you and I - will have some chocolate milk TOGETHER. That’s what adorable people do, you know.”
“Yeah. They do. Cows aren’t adorabubble. They don’t drink chokit molk.”
“No, they don’t.”
“Poor cows.”
“So let’s get dressed for school!”
“Oh yeah! Skewel!”
“Okay – and you’ll be on your best behavior today, right – no whining, no fussing?”
“Yeah. I’ll be MY MOST ADORABUBBLE EVER.”
“Good! I love hearing glowing reports from your teacher.”
“Well Mama, know what I love? When I have simanin for breck-kiss. It makes me adorabubble AAALLLL DAAAYYYY.”
“Really?”
“Prom-isk.”
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Fun story!