The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 2862 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
09/17/09
I'm sure more people can relate to this than we will ever know. Vivid images in this piece. Good work.
09/17/09
I like so much about this I don't know where to start. The range of emotions it raised in me were unbelieveable. I like Alana and the way she handled this gave me the best picture of who her mother really is. Great job!
09/18/09
Sad, but truer than you think.
09/19/09
Your intense descriptions of Marta's despair made me ache for her and all those like her--and there are many. God's timing was perfect in sending the daughter to her rescue--so glad this ended on a positive note.
09/19/09
The depth of loss is expressed well in all its pain and despair.
09/22/09
Marta's poignant story is compelling. I was so glad for your ending.
09/22/09
You did a marvelous job portraying the weight of depression....very well done!
09/22/09
Isn't it just like god to show us what we have to live for just when we need it?
Your story pulled at me and I felt the deep emotions. The emptyness.
Thank you for a happier ending.

mona
09/22/09
I cried. Very well written; just beautiful.
So compelling! God doesn't want us to be alone - he made that clear in Genesis 2:18. We need to be there for our parents/seniors in their golden years - especially the widowed. Alana and the grandchildren made the perfect ending. A chilling reminder to us all that it is NOT ok that they be alone....great writing!
Very well written. I felt the weight of the MC's depression. I'm also so glad that God is never late. Well done.
We are considering retirement in the next couple of years. This really made me think.

I'm glad the daughter came along when she did. Well done.
The writing is so vivid my heart broke for Marta. I was happy that God sent her family. Excellent!
09/22/09
This left me in tears. What a timely ending. I'm so glad... Well done. I felt Marta's pain clear throughout...
Tears here too. Was gripping from start to finish. Great writing, Cat.
09/23/09
This is heartbreaking, but beautiful--just in time, she was reminded that she really did have a reason to live. Very powerful emotions here... well done.
09/23/09
Fantastic title, and a heartwrenching story. I was thankful for the ending, but I can't help but wonder what you scribbled in your notebook...Awesome job, Cat.
09/23/09
Her pain was so real and raw. Nice, nice job in expressing it. I especially loved the line "Settling into the hollow he left behind felt like sinking into him." Wow. Just my two cents, but I thought the ending was perfect, uplifting but not in a cheesy way. Hopeful, yet still genuine.
Your poignant story has wonderful descriptions. Your pictures of depression and loneliness were real, and I really liked the ending
09/23/09
This was an amazing piece of writing...you pulled the emotions out so descriptively that I felt them. Really, Really wonderful writing and I too, loved the line about the rocking chair and "sinking into him" I paused in my reading to read that line twice...

~Cathy~
This is heavy stuff and you handled it with great skill. Honestly, you get better with every entry, Cat, and I really look forward to your work. Big time kudos on a subject that's difficult. Lvyu.
09/24/09
Wow. I have goosebumps. Great writing, Cat. Wow. So glad help came for Marta in time. Congratulations on your EC!!!
Congratulations on a well-deserved win! You defined deep depession in a very unique way and if you hadn't placed high with this one, I was gonna raise a ruckus with the judges! Just kidding. LOL :-) Big time kudos, my friend! Hugs!
09/24/09
Congratulations, Cat. The depth of loneliness is one everybody should recognize and be sensitive to.
09/24/09
Hey, Cat!! Congrats on 2nd place!! This is so cool!
09/25/09
You painted the scene so beautifully with your prose and conveyed the MC's feelings so vividly. What a well deserved EC placement.
09/25/09
Okay, let me get the tears out of my eyes so I can write. The raw emotion of this story was palpable. It was like being right there with your MC every step of the way.Well written, it drew me in and held on tight. Congratulations on the second place on both the level and EC. Well deserved.
10/01/09
I have to ask if this is a true story? I felt the pain and lonliness. I cried through tears of wonderment at God's amazing grace. Thank you.
Congratulations on placing 2nd with this excellent piece, Cat!!
This story totally made me cry. I could imagine her pain and triumph in God's grace. Awesome work!
10/25/13
HI! I've been reading some of your work and noticed the story about the year the magic died (about Santa). I wondered if you would be interested in reading my story "Santa Claus is For Real" under the topic Expert for faith writers, intermediate level. Thanks for enjoying my story "The One Who Sees Me." I actually just participated in a research program at a museum where I shared this story again. I came back and re-noticed how nice and healing your comment was : ) . Thanks! -Emily Gillilan