The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Wow! Incredible story of unselfishness!
11/07/19
What a loving, giving woman. My jaw dropped at the end. Wow! Generous indeed. Thank you for sharing this beautiful story with us.
You have written the most beautiful picture of generosity I could even imagine. What a wonderful mother you had. I wish I could have known her.
11/09/19
Oh, you made me cry! Such a treasured soul.
11/11/19
Oh, wow. What a story.

You have a POV shift from Anna's mother to Anna herself after the 1st paragraph. Easily fixed, though, and it didn't detract from the story itself.

Great job telling your mom's story.
11/14/19
Congratulations on First Place. Well deserved!
11/14/19
Wow, what an incredible story. Loved it. Well done on first place!
11/15/19
I could tell this was written straight from the heart. And what a perfect last sentence. Well deserved first place win!
11/21/19
What a wonderful example of a loving Christian mother. I'm sure she blessed many people.

Congratulations on winning 1st place this week.

I would take out the first line of your story. It shifted the POV away from your mom to your grandmother.