The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/12/19
A cute story, but with a very real, very good reminder. Well-written, and I liked the inner dialogue.
07/12/19
Well written in content and delivery, along with an important message for everyone.
Thank you for sharing and for the info in the close.

Blessings~
07/13/19
Great job with the voice. I especially like the attitude at the end. Mentioning the iPhone made for a great comparison of ways of life.
I really enjoyed your story. I loved the grit of your MC, and I could have whooped the bully myself. I appreciated the opportunity you offered to help people in need, like those in your example. The dialogue was well done.
07/14/19
Love the inner dialogue in this well-told story. And what a great way to point people to an organization to help those who live in conditions like the folks in your story.
07/16/19
My sister spent 2 years working in a Kentucky orphanage one time, way back in the wood where the only travel was by horseback. Your story is so much like the stories she wrote home about and like you, she got the dialogue down pat. I loved the Appalachian mindset you portrayed so well about how difficult life can be for good-hearted people who learn to live with so little. I could see a book about Appalachia written by you! Good job!


Well done! I can hear the twang in your dialogue.
This is an awesome story. I felt transported to The Waltons, but in modern times. The only thing that made me scratch my head was her having her license. It's expensive to get, and without any hope of affording a car or gas, it seems strange they'd spend money for a license. (I even looked it up, and although it's a fraction of the cost in NY, it's still $35, which would be a lot for the MC, but more manageable than if she lived in NY.) I thought her voice was splendid; you did a fantastic job of capturing it without overdoing it, and that's extremely difficult to do. I also liked how you showed she was intelligent and received good grades, and you can't judge people by their accents. You really developed your MC, and I felt like I knew her. I think the message about bullies is spot on and so relevant no matter where you live. I could easily see this in an Appalachian magazine or other avenues as well. You did a great job of writing on topic while delivering an important message. Congratulations on your EC. Happy Dance!