The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
The first part is awesome. My heart went out to the young boy. I could relate to the fear since when my kids were little (and even now at times), they were burdened with a sick mother. They were afraid. They were blessed to have a caring family surround them. The next part confused me a bit. I wasn't quite sure what was happening, but it could be my fuzzy brain. I get your take on words at the end. I'm not sure if I totally agree with it, but respect your right to say it. I'm not sure using different definitions have made the world a harsher place, but our lack of understanding, agape love, and spreading the word of God has more to do with it in my humble opinion. You do give the reader something to think about though and you have a great take on the topic. Good job.
I wondered if someone would pick up the changes in our language (living language, indeed). Interesting idea, though it may have been easier for the reader to understand if the two stories had been woven together somehow.
I enjoyed the first half of this story and I'm glad it ended on a positive note. I was totally confused on part two, wondering what the relationship was with the first story. I think that each of the three sections would be great stand-alone stories.