The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This piece was vividly descriptive. I could picture things I’d rather not see:). Well done. A lighthearted piece that delivered an unexpected wonderful punch at the end. Very clever.
I like the premise. The first half felt way over-worked. Perhaps if you'd toned down some of the superfluous verbiage in the first half, it would have left a bit more breathing room at the end to keep it from feeling rushed. But again, the premise is solid and there were plenty of little moments that made it well worth reading.
I really, really liked this. I could see it as a movie, or maybe the beginning of a novel. The voice is perfect. Very well done.
Very clever with great descriptions.
Very interesting story! I wondered where it was going! Loved your opening and closing lines.
You have some delightful descriptions that gave your character depth. He was easy to envision. The beginning was a bit slow for me, but the ending more than made up for it. I loved the message and it left me with a smile on my face.
I liked the descriptions that made the main character real. This was a very interesting read!
This was so interesting! And not predictable at all. It really kept my interest. Fantastic writing!
A well written piece, thank you!
God BLess~
Congratulations Jack for your well deserved 1st place!
Congratulations! I enjoyed your creative map story.
Congratulations on your #1 Editor's Choice win! Loved this!
Thanks to all for your encouraging and thoughtful comments. Blessings as we learn to travel these miles together.
You have a way with words and an extraordinary story telling ability.

The ending summed up the story well.

It's always a pleasure reading your stories because of your unique point-of-view.

Congratulations, Jack.
Congratulations Jack! This is such a well-told story. The characters are believably down-to-earth and the dialogue sounds just right. Great writing!
What a creative and fun story to read. Excellent! I really enjoyed it.