Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: GREED (03/08/18)
- TITLE: An Overabundance of Biscuits
By Donna Powers
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Now, everybody who’s anybody likes my chocolate biscuits; so I spose it coulda happened at any of our company gatherings, but ya asked me to tell ya what happened.
See, Kitty Mae had a bride shower cuz Cletus finally got off his duff and asked her to marry him. ‘Bout time, if ya ask me. Kitty Mae’s bride shower was pretty nice, and everyone was chowing down on the vittles at the table, and as usual my chocolate biscuits got a bunch of praise from all and sundry.
So, of course it weren’t no surprise that our boss, Mr. Peterson liked ‘em. Anyone with taste buds likes my biscuits. But Mr. Peterson didn’t just like ‘em. He straight up loved ‘em. He took three at first; but then kept creepin’ over to the table to get some more.
And then more.
‘Til, in the end, he’d scarfed down more than half the biscuits I’d brought. After the bride shower, when Mr. Peterson found out I made those biscuits, he asked me would I please make another big batch just for him.
Well, he was the boss, and I liked makin’ biscuits. So I made more. And when he asked for another batch the next day, I made another batch. And then another.
After 2 weeks of makin’ biscuits every day after work, I began to feel a little miffed. It was kinda scary to complain to the boss, but I did it. I mean… them baking supplies don’t come cheap, and I did have a life apart from work, so….
But he was purty firm on me to keep on bakin’ them biscuits. “I love your biscuits , Mary Sue,” he told me. “I don’t know what it is about them, but I just can’t get enough of them. I just want more and more. They’re just so chocolatey! I can pay you extra for the ingredients. And, after all, I am your boss. And even though baking biscuits isn’t part of your job, you do NEED this job to feed your family. It would be a shame to lose it. Right, Mary Sue?”
Well, when he put it like that… what could I do? Claim cookie harassment?
So I kept makin’ them biscuits. I made ‘em ‘most every day, after work. After a week or so, 2 dozen weren’t enough for him. So I made three dozen. Then, four dozen.
After awhile, I guess I just got fed up – ya know? I had to figure a way to get him to stop eating them biscuits. So, I figured if he liked chocolate, I would include a special ingredient that looked and tasted like chocolate. One that would put a crimp in his gut and send him running for the facilities …and maybe discourage him from wanting me to rustle up a neverending heap of biscuits.
So I did it. I guess I’m sorry he got so sick, but I’m not sorry he stopped askin’ for more and more biscuits. About an hour after he ate my last batch of biscuits, I saw him make a beeline for the office mens’ room; his face as green as lime custard. In the end, I had to fess up to adding a couple of squares of chocolate laxative in that last batch of biscuits.
So, after he finally stopped having to run to the mens’ room every half hour… he fired me.
So that’s why I’m here at the unemployment office. You’re such a nice lady, to listen to my story. You wanna cookie? They’re chocolate. Oh, don’t worry … they’re just regular chocolate. I done learned my lesson.
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