The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/12/18
This was a sweet story we all can relate to! Children always have a "favorite" book, and it is the most precious thing to them. You've captured this concept as a thoughtful Nana shows her concerns. The story flowed easily through each paragraph and tied everything up into a "good feeling" bundle at the end! Great job!
01/16/18
Colorful story and fun to read! The climax was totally believable - upon moving day, anything can happen to your stuff! Only one suggestion - whenever you can come up with a descriptive wording that does not involve using a cliché it works even better. For example avoid using well know wordings like "sad puppy dog eyes" "snug like a bug" "eyes big as saucers" - Once in a while its ok to use a familiar term, but several clichés in one story tends to make the whole story seem too cliché. It takes time and imagination to develop our own unique phrasings but it helps make our own writer's voice heard and is worth the effort. Just a suggestion.