Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD (08/03/17)
- TITLE: Huh?
By C D Swanson
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Comma here, comma there…
Where’s the connection?
Paragraph here, paragraph there…
Too much topic
POV switch here, POV switch there…
Wrap up here, open ended there…
Almost made it
Didn’t make it
Too wordy here, not enough content there…
Knew where this was going
The ending was disappointing
Too preachy here, not enough conviction there…
Kind of cheesy
Too much sentiment here, not enough heart there…
Tell don’t show
Show don’t tell
Too convoluted here, too much clarity there…
Over the top and sanctimonious
Too much pretense here, too much truth there…
Unbelievable behavior for a child MC
A boring drawn-out sluggish plot
Too much action here, not enough action there…
Not a fan of prose
This isn't prose
The rhythm is off here, not enough meters there…
Can’t figure this out
Figured it out too soon
Needs a slow buildup here, quickly wraps up there…
Could have said more
Should have said less
Typo here, editing issues there...
Bing--bang--boom goes my heart
Okay, back to the beginning
Hmmm, let’s see, where do I start?
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