The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
05/30/14
Excellent job of describing the struggles of temptation, and the battle to win.

With the Gospel Armor and God on our side, we win every time.

Thanks for sharing this penetrating piece of writing.

God bless~
06/01/14
Oh wow, if this is not a winner I will eat my shoes. (not really) but this is so true to form. It seemed as if you had taken a page from my own book of life.

Great writing here. Truly a winner.
06/01/14
That certainly kept me on the edge of my seat. An emotional roller-coaster. Very well written. I really felt the compassion for the one struggling. Great job.
06/01/14
This is a magnificent illustration of how we struggle when we try to do it on our own, versus accepting the help of an almighty God. Even those of us who are saved, often still find ourselves trying to do everything ourselves and painting ourselves into a corner. It's only when we are broken enough to cry out to Him, and receive His help, that we realize how monumentally stupid we have been.

Great job! One of my favorites this week!
I understand and identify with your growing pangs. This is so heartfelt and beautiful . . .
06/01/14
I understand wholeheartedly what's written here, so nicely done! A beautiful tribute to our Holy Bestie who never lets us down! I love when "He puts the helmet on our head"!
Good job! It made me want to jump in and fight with the one that's loosing.

'I am losing.'
This reminds me of some verses in Isaiah 26 - In verse 17 and 18 we are likened to a woman in childbirth. verse 18 ends with 'We have been with child, ...been in pain, we have ...brought forth wind; we have not wrought any deliverance in the earth; neither have the inhabitants of the world fallen.' But the next verse is the words of God, reminding us of the part of the story we haven't seen yet: 'Thy dead men shall live, together with my dead body shall they arise. Awake and sing, ye that dwell in dust'
06/02/14
Certainly a novel approach to using Jesus as the Bestie. I really liked the content of this sentence: "Light flashes everywhere and the road ahead becomes visible, the hidden traps of the enemy are revealed." God's word is truly revealing, and lights our way, even opening our eyes to the ploys of the enemy.

You did a splendid job of portraying the struggle against the weak flesh, then contrasting it with the power of faith leading to victory.

I feel that many readers would benefit by including a reference to Ephesians 6: 10-18 (The Armor of God), where this piece meets with greater understanding.

In Christ, we no longer have a crisis of identity—our true identity shines forth—who we were meant to be.

I think you nailed down these truths rather well. Keep the good stuff coming!

P.S. Your comments in the brick throwing links, confirmed what the Lord revealed to me just before I went to the forums. My "too busy" reasoning no longer holds water. Thank you.
06/02/14
A graphic portrayal of Romans chapter seven, which leads into the freedom of ensuing chapter. Great job.
You described vividly the victim and the Savior, the problem and the Solution, the tempted and the Helper, the fallen and the Forgiver. May God add His blessing to your writing.
This is an intense piece. Your message is clear and spoke to my heart. The one red ink I'd give is 7 (yes I counted as I read) exclamation points are at least 6, if not 7, too many for a story of this length. Save the one in dialog at the end. The rest of the time, you picked great words that did your exclaiming for you. I thought the dual take on the topic was genius. Many wrote about Jesus being our best friend this week, but you made yours different by having the MC struggle with other "friends." Great writing. Congratulations on ranking 12th overall. Happy Dance!
Congratulations on ranking 15th overall! Happy Dance!
Sorry about that. I wanted my name to show up a lot so you wouldn't forget me. I need to be careful with the tablet and my fat fingers, it's too easy to click on wrong one. My original congratulations stands as far as your ranking goes. :)