The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
You did a wonderful job of making Sam feel so very real. I truly felt for him.
This is an outstanding piece. I could feel the pain with each step, the embarrassment of noting slippers, the ragged breaths. You did an amazing job of pulling me right into this story. It's an amazing read.
Great characters. His emotions seemed very real. I also like how you ended your story with a bit of mystery at how the scene transpired.
You have truly brought old Sam to life with such vivid external descriptions and with such a candid view of his inner thoughts. Exremely absorbing read, with a very tender close. Should rate highly.
Simply lovely - engaging. A well-rounded story tenderly told.
Outstanding piece of writing, excellent job of story telling, and fabulous entry overall.
God bless~
Who could "rip this to shreds" ( your invitation on the boards); I wanted to savor each word. Your characters were rich and Sam's thoughts and feelings just jumped into my pores as I read. The ants were busy and he no longer was; those ants caught Sam's attention twice because when you reach that kind of disability in your living (isn't simply relegated to the old either, I have Firbromyalgia and could easily relate) one notices all of those daily things in life that make one feel less than. Your ending caught me off guard, but if it meant what I thought it did -- that Jesus took Sam home to be with his wife because of Kathy calling his son Peter, I thought it was very fitting and so like our Lord! He heard Sam's heart cry about missing his wife in the church! That was my interpretation, I may be way off... But either way, between your wonderful English / Aussie vocabulary; plot and how the reader felt everything through his "shuffles" -- this is truly a treasure of a piece! Thanks for the blessing!
Oh, this was great. I was actually afraid it might have a sad/happy ending, but I like your ending better. Nice job.
You've caught the real-life feelings of my own 90-year-old Aussie Mum brilliantly here. She has yet to join my father, but would totally identify with Sam, should she read this excellent article. The reader can't help but be pulling for the old fellow as she reads your piece. Lovely job!
This is excellent. Sam is such a wonderful character, and you brought him to life so well. Nicely done!
I work with elderly in hospice, and felt the authenticity in your writing, and the authenticity in your heart! A beautiful read.
Beautifully written, engaging and tender. These words describe your story well. Well done!
Shuffling in his shoes, I absolutely loved this!
What a beautifully touching story! My heart went out to tired old Sam, and I'm glad he found peace in the church and rest in Jesus! This was so excellently-written, with a lovely ending. Great job!
I can only echo everything that has been said and thank you for such a wonderful and touching story. A very apt title too! Your descriptions bring Sam to life and it's so true, God in His great goodness, continues to speak even right up to our last minutes on earth. Thank you for such a lovely piece.
Congratulations!!! HAPPY DANCE!!!
Hearty congratulations on your E.C. win for this great story! :)
Congratulations, Danielle. And, I respectfully and most humbly release you from any obligation of "eating your hat" by the ranking of my own entry : ). Your story and the way it was told so very deserving of your EC and Placement. Thanks, too, for your comment on mine - it is genuinely appreciated.
Congrats Danielle.

God bless~
Lovely story that held me enthralled and gave me pause for reflection of the dilemma faced by so many of our elderly.
A beautiful piece-thank you and congratulations.