The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/12/05
Well done! I really liked your description of the reactions in heaven. In the first part of the story, you occasionally put paragraph breaks when the same speaker was still speaking. It made it a bit tricky to keep track of the speakers. Great approach to the topic for this week!
09/13/05
Soon as I find out who this is, I'm going to e-mail you. Please be my writing partner? Please?!!! :P Good to see another person who wants to try a different approach to writing and the topics.
09/14/05
put a hyphen between angel-lined throne room. I liked the part that depicts the embrace in heaven that send shudders throughout heaven that resulted in the...just a minute, I have to re-read that part.
09/14/05
"which rent apart to make way for the son's departure." Awesome wording! I read something this week that kind of struck me, it's this: Jesus was the only one who has ever lived who elected to be born. It was His choice to be born. Unlike the rest of us, we did not have a choice in the matter of where we would be born or not. that's just a little aside.
09/14/05
spelling clarification: we did not have the choice of whether we would be born or not. sorry.
09/21/05
Karen, we meet again!

I was actually acting as a Judge for Level 1 for the Bon Voyage Challenge as well (we've been a bit light on judges for the last few weeks, so I've been filling in a lot) and I have to say that this entry impressed me enormously. It could have ended up incredibly corny, but it wasn't. Instead, it was powerful. Well done and keep rising to the Challenge! It's great to see another Aussie writing so well. Love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)