The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/01/09
This cut me.

I especially love the lines:

But I am a man, not a tree
though I am soft to some degree
I can be hard,
(like you in many parts)
And I have difficulty
letting go.
Each old leaf means something
to me.


And of course that awesome last stanza and last line. Reminds me of an Amy Carmichael poem.

Wonderful. Love the format you chose, too. Very fitting.
05/02/09
Simply gorgeous. Mesmerizing cadence...and the last lines melted my soul. I loved it.
Perfection.
05/04/09
Gorgeous, and I love your use of the best tools in a poet's toolbox: alliteration, imagery, playful syntax. This is a remarkable poem!
05/04/09
You have ministered to me in this remarkable poem. Time to let go of the dead leaves and let them fly. Great metaphor!
This is both lyrically beautiful and deeply meaningful. Well done.
05/04/09
Very lovely, poetic "tree" piece! :)

Favorite parts were your wonderful ending and these:

"Your leaves
yawn and reach
across branches
in murmurous motion;" ("Murmurous motion"--exquisite!!)

*********

To dance with opus wind,
twirling, spinning,
doubled in perfect harmony,
yellow over orange,
like colorful skaters
tracing the chill
of night
until they land softly,
gracefully, upon
the hard soil
at your feet."
(Autumn is my favorite season, and I can just "see" this beautiful scene in my mind's eye!)

**********

Great job! :)
One of the best poems I have ever read on FaithWriters hands down! The comparison of man to a tree was eye-opening as I had never quite thought of things in this way before. Best words I can sue to describe this are beautiful and breathtaking. This is a perfect example of words coming alive.
I meant to say:

Best words I can "use" to describe this are
beautiful and breathtaking.

There will be no suing of words today. I don't want to have to pay a lawyer. :)