The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1440 times
Member Comments
This is priceless—really good stuff!
Ummm, I'm not too sure about all the biology stuff or the food chains (is that the right word, Mrs Kensington? I'm not talking about supermarkets here. Although there is a good deal on Pepsi this week ... oh, yeah, sorry) but I think that this was a lot of laughs and I really liked the bit about the cheerleaders and the jocks 'cos that was like a really cool application and hope that everyone leaves the goths alone because they've got enough problems of their own.
This voice is so perfect...I love it. I laughed and laughed reading this. Excellent writing.
I totally got a kick out of this! I could hear this girl's voice so clearly. Wonderful job!
This could just as easily been my 15 yr old grandson talking. Sounds just like one of his stories. very well done. Held my interest.

You are KILLING me! This was so hilarious. I loved the rambling, ADD, frilly teenage voice. Perfection. Just ask Jessica. Lol.
Ok, now that like need to totally win! Classic piece of writing and I think you'll definitely place very very high with it!
This is great! Really made me chuckle...I wonder if it stays on topic though. Hehe...I'm sure this will score high. Thanks for the chuckles!
So clever and FUN! This must have been a complete blast to write. Such an authentic voice!
Has to be a teacher who's able to imitate a teen voice so perfectly...and humorously. I like how you sneaked some facts about animals of Africa into this delightful piece.
Fun read. Well done. Have yet to see a zebra alongside a lion! Only the movies.
This whole thing cracked me up. Seriously, Mrs. kensington, it did. I agree, the nerds? The ones with the coke bottle glasses and trousers to their chest like Erkle? Even they need some love. Just 'cause they're the smartest kid, doesn't mean they should be targeted as lower life forms.

Oooh, what a great read. You had me laughing the whole way through, especially at the end.
This was so typical....a little blond.....and much like most teens I've ever known, unfortunately. Very clever and cute entry.
Seriously, Mrs. Kensington, why didn't you make her remove that gum from her mouth? I know she HAD to be chewing gum.

Great entry.
This was too funny and incredibly clever. I absolutely loved it.
As a youth pastor I hear teens talk like this all the time! Super authetic and entertaining!
I was there in the classroom - I could hear Lily (Wiwwy), I could smell the kids (especially the boys - must have been after their lunch break) and I could see you quietly sitting in the corner taking notes for your FW challenge entry, Mrs Kensington.
Jan, this is really, really good!
Your voice is excellent, and your story is hilarious...
But one of the best things I got from this story is the reason your MC didn't know anything about Africa, is because she really didn't care.
And that is something to meditate on...
You had to have sat through my high school speach class! This is perfect! I can still hear my friends doing an impromptu just like that (though her name wasn't Lilly). This was great. I am still laughing.
I LOVED this! LOVED it! Great writing. It was like you took notes from an actual teenager's speech. Cuz I know - I've heard them personally:) Awesome job!
Okay, so I didn't learn a lot about Africa, but I did learn a few life lessons and that was "way" worth the read : )
I also didn't know "Lion King" was borrowed from Shakespeare. Goodness, the things you pick up by hanging around here.
The things you learn around here. And here I thought the Lion King was the Lyin' King. You're good at this writing thing. I think you should teach it or something.
I sit here shaking my head in wonder. I sense a winner coming up here Mrs. Kensington.

You must have laughed yourself silly while writing this, Jan. I could so hear your MC's voice, like you know?

What a fun story. You did the teen voice so well. I really liked the ending where you brought it all together into a nice neat conclusion. Lilly may not be very good at impromptu speeches, but you gave her wisdom.
I am like so surprised that you totally didn't make it into the top 10. It was like so well written and everything!

Jan - as usual you provided humor and knowledge in this piece.
Jan, this was my favourite in the Africa topic. Did you kidnap my 16 year old daughter and morph her into this piece? I so recognized her!
Yesterday she shared this article with her friends at school (in Australia!) and they were thoroughly entertained!
Thank you for a great job - you made all of us smile and laugh aloud. Best line.. "I was practically Amish".
Haha! Loved this! Sooo funny! The part about the zebra getting his striped hiney back into the jungle and the part about being practically Amish cracked me up! So glad I read this one. Hilarious. :)