The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/20/08
What a wonderful concept.
11/22/08
I had to study A Christmas Carol in homeschool with my son this year and it struck me that although it's a famous moral tale, Dickens was not a Christian man and his story lacks a sense of true spirituality. So it's good that you've had a go at addressing this.
I'm not convinced however that you've got the voice quite right. Your Scrooge sounds a little too modern to my ears. Here's an extract from the book to illustrate what I mean:

"This court", said Scrooge, "through which we hurry now, is where my place of occupation is, and has been for a length of time. I see the house. Let me behold what I shall be, in days to come!"
The Spirit stopped; the hand was pointed elsewhere.
"The house is yonder", Scrooge exclaimed. "Why do you point away?"
The inexorable finger underwent no change."

Great writing. It's no wonder that Dickens is still widely read so many years after his demise.
11/22/08
I adore the whole idea of this. You presented it wonderfully, too. Superb tie-in to the topic!
11/26/08
Yes, a bit of an adjustment in the voice and you've got it nailed. What a wonderful idea—and how true—Scrooge had the most important step yet to take. Well done.
11/27/08
Loved that you "completed" this masterpiece story by showing Scrooge how to gain victory over sin by choosing Jesus as Saviour. Loved your idea. How interesting it would be for us writers to do this with other classics as well! Congratulations on your EC!
Congratulations on your EC with this very original, creative entry. This could be written into an entire sequel.