The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a wonderful poem. I like the flow, the repetition, the emotion and the imagery. Great job.
Beautiful, poignant imagery that tugs at the heartstrings. Just lovely (and I like your change to the "Mary" line) :)
I loved the message of your poem. It was very touching and a different take on 'pastor'. To be honest, I felt the poem lacked in the rhythm department, yet the flow of your story was great. I could 'hear' and 'smell', and I felt badly that he didn't have any cookies or turkey! So glad the elders came to pray!
Aww, poor lonely old fellow.
This evoked some sadness in me, which is a good thing. I do agree that the rhythm could flow a little better, but all in all, I like this. Good job!
The rythym was a bit difficult for me as well, but the story line more than makes up for it! I could feel the old pastor's pain; and when the elder's showed up to pray, I could feel God's grace and love flow. Nice work. Blessings, Cheri
Had to chuckle at myself when I re-read my comment to your entry. Not only can I not write poetry myself, but I cannot spell rhythm. Oops! Blessings, Cheri
I got choked up at the ending! terrific story - don't know anything about poetry but loved the tale beneath.:)
I agree with most of the comments above. The meter was a little off from time to time, but the phrases and imagery were very good. Well done.
A very touching story that was well written in verse. Great job!
I hesitated to read your entry when you mentioned that it was a poem, but was pleasantly surprised once I read it and now I'm glad that I did. This was an excellent poem and I really enjoyed it from start to finish, something rare for me with poetry. hehe