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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: CLUMSY (04/11/19)
“You can be my big helper by holding the basket,” Mama said. She reached into a straw-lined bin in our hen house to collect the eggs. We counted together as she placed them in the basket. “One, two, three…”
Just then a little squeak interrupted us.

“What’s that Mama?”

Mama walked over to look inside a tin can sitting on a window ledge. “Oh, Beth!” she whispered. “I have a surprise for you!” She gathered me up in her arms so I could see. I peeked inside the can to see several newborn mice!

I reached out to touch them. “Can I hold them?”

“Yes, of course!” she said. Carefully she took the tin can down off the shelf and helped me hold it.

I stared at the little pink babies wriggling on top of each other. They had such cute little tails! “Can I show Aunt Pat?” I pleaded.

“Let’s do!” Mama set me down on my feet and made sure both my hands were wrapped securely around the tin can. Then we walked towards the front yard where Aunt Pat and some family friends stood chatting and laughing under our big maple tree.

I kept my eyes glued on the baby mice as I walked. With each step, I hesitated, steadying myself to keep them from falling out. I felt so important that Mama had let me carry them and I could hardly wait to show my aunt our big surprise.

The adults were too busy to notice as we rounded the corner of the house, until, that is, I tripped on a tree root sticking up in the path. All heads turned towards me as the tin can flew through the air scattering baby mice in all directions. Through my big tears and little sobs, I watched the adults stare at me in surprise, but not the kind of surprise I had imagined.

“Shouldn’t have let her carry the mice! She wasn’t coordinated enough to do that!” Aunt Pat spat the words out with a contemptuous snicker.

A strange feeling rushed over me-humiliation from the very aunt I’d wanted to please. She could have bent down and wiped my tears, instead she pierced my little heart with shame. Her words, a careless rebuke aimed at my mother, were spoken over me–their imprint a curse, not a blessing.

My memory is not pleasant, but its lesson is my treasure. It reminds me all these years later that my words, when spoken over others, can be to them a blessing and not a curse.

James 3:10 (An Understandable Version)
Praise and cursing come out of the same mouth! My brothers, these things should not be happening.
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This article has been read 379 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Barbara Culler 
04/19/19
Awww, poor little one! I've been the recipient of such words from an aunt, and still remember them to this day. I'm curious though, why were there baby mice in a tin can in the hen house? And did they survive the fall?
Dave Walker 
04/19/19
A poignant and relatable story well told and with a very relevant message. We need to be so careful with our words to and about children. Life and death are in the tongue.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
04/22/19
I could feel the pain of the little girl, along with the earlier wonder and delight. What a great message. I wanted to scoop her up into my arms. You did a fine job of developing the characters and delivering an important message.
Elaine Ballard
04/24/19
Thank you for writing about this topic! It held my interest and thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Well done!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
04/26/19
Congratulations on ranking 17 overall. The highest rankings can be found on the message boards. Happy Dance!