Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: FIZZLE (06/09/16)
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TITLE: The Change | Previous Challenge Entry
By Sylvia Young
06/13/16 -
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Lying in the bed next to her, Derek snored softly, his large form rising and falling rhythmically. His breath, interspersed with the rasping sound, was so steady, and it used to lull her to sleep in the early days of their marriage, but now…the whiffling snore raked across her nerves. It represented everything that their relationship had become of lately—frustrating.
The connection they’d once shared had eroded over the past year, and she was responsible for probably half of the demise. Now, their love was nonexistent. What had been a passionate, amazing bond had just slowly fizzled out.
Derek mumbled in his sleep and tossed about. In the moonlight, she could make out his contorted features.
“Don’t…don’t go. I can’t…I won’t…” His breath hitched and quavered.
He was having a bad dream, but about what?
“I’m sorry…So…sorry,” Derek mumbled. His face relaxed, his breathing resuming its regular rhythm.
What was he thinking? What tormented him?
In days past, she would’ve known, but now he barely spoke to her. In the mornings, they ate breakfast together, drove to work together and then didn’t speak again until the end of the day--and then only about trivial matters.
He never called her at work the way Nancy’s husband did. He didn’t send flowers for no reason the way Michelle’s husband did. He didn’t show up and surprise her for lunch the way Carrie’s husband did.
Didn’t he see how neglected she felt?
Restless, she threw back the covers and strode toward the window, pushing it all the way open and letting the cool night air rush over her, soothe her.
She remembered nights when they’d stay up until all hours just talking, sharing dreams and hopes for the future, laughing over small incidents of the day and crying over past disappointments. He’d understood her then.
And now?
Her heart cried out, raged against the God who had given His blessing over their marriage. She’d prayed regularly in the months before their union, asking God to show her if she was making the right decision, and she thought He had.
When the two of them had wed, they’d incorporated God into their daily lives, reading the Bible and praying together. They’d asked God to bless them, keep them strong and protect their love.
So, what had happened?
First there was his new job, so demanding, so time-consuming. Then came her new friends, so critical of Derek for not spoiling her the way their husbands did.
But as she confronted these facts, something even bigger came to her mind.
They’d stopped praying together.
At first they’d just skipped a time or two, but then one time became two or three in a row, then a week and finally they’d dropped it altogether. Neither one had commented on the disappearance of prayer from their lives. It had just happened.
She closed the window and sat at the small desk in front of it, the place where she used to do her morning devotions. That part of her life had also faded away. Bit by bit, she’d lost every semblance of her daily walk with God. She’d allowed the worries of the day to overtake her, leaning on her own understanding of the world.
With a deep breath in, she placed her hand on the Bible Derek had given her long ago. It was a leather-bound edition, her name engraved on the front. Just a few years ago, a day wouldn’t pass without opening it, but now, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d done so.
Turning on the small lamp, she pulled the heavy book toward her, flipping through its pages.
A musty smell greeted her, letting her know that it had been too long since she’d mined its depths for the wisdom she needed in this life.
Memory upon memory of Derek and her snuggled up, reading and praying overwhelmed her. They’d been so in love back then. Was it actually too late for them, or did they just need to change?
The thought of actually leaving him soured her stomach and pierced her heart. In truth, she didn’t want their marriage to end; she just wanted a change.
She opened the Bible to the Psalms, and let the words of Kind David remind her of God’s goodness.
That change would begin with her.
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