Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Sad (07/26/07)
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TITLE: Sad Saddie | Previous Challenge Entry
By Jacqueline Zerres
08/02/07 -
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Today is my fifteenth birthday and this is my first entry.
Saddie’s my name but my friends in the youth group nicknamed my Sad.
S erious
A lmighty
D oubter
I can’t help it. It’s not that I don’t believe in God…it’s…well…a long story.
It all started when I was twelve and my dog, Tag, died. He was my best friend.
When I was nine, Tag followed me home from school. The next day was summer vacation, I remember. Here was this mutt, the shaggy fur on his belly caked with mud and seriously smelling of wet dog. One ear poked straight up as though it heard something real interesting. Part of the other ear was missing. I turned to shoo him away but he plopped down on his bottom and beat the ground with his tail. His tongue hung to one side and his mouth dripped long strands of slobber. Disgusting. I walked faster. So did he. I ran the rest of the way, jumping the hedge in Mr. Wilson’s yard and cutting across Maple Street, hoping to lose the fur ball. The next thing I heard was the sound of screeching tires and yelping. When I looked back, there was the mutt laying in the street. The lousy driver didn’t even stop.
I ran to where the little dog was sprawled on the road. I have to admit, Diary, he had a sweet temper; he didn’t even try to bite me when I lifted his head and laid it in my lap. He just stared at me with his big puppy dog eyes. I fell in love with him that day.
Daddy took him to the vet and had his broken leg set. When no one answered the ad we put in the paper, I practiced my Florence Nightingale skills and fussed over him for the next several weeks. Mom said I should be outside playing but I just couldn’t, seeing how it was all my fault that he was hurt. At first he hobbled around and whimpered a lot but soon he was outside running on three legs. I had named him Tag because he followed me home, but soon he grew into his name and never left my side all summer.
My grandpa died the next year. I missed him so much but Tag was right there. I sat on the porch for days after the funeral and Tag would lay his head in my lap and look up at me like he understood. I guess I wasn’t so mad with God yet. Even though I was sad, Mom said grandpa was old and it was his time to go home and be with Jesus.
Then my best friend Gracie moved to Michigan. At first, she emailed me every week, telling me about her great life and all the new friends she made. Soon her emails stopped. I guess she forgot me but Tag was loyal until the end.
I haven’t told this to anyone, Diary, but I was really, REALLY angry with God when Tag died. He was such a good little dog. If God was so loving, how could he let Tag suffer like that. Especially after I prayed so hard. Everyone thought I was sad but I was mad and kept it to myself. I hate feeling so angry but I don’t know what to do.
Well, my youth pastor, Randy, is downstairs, mom said, so I have to go for now.
See ya, Saddie
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Dear Diary,
Sorry I didn’t get back to you for a couple of days but I have some good news. Guess what? Randy brought me a gift for my birthday. A puppy – can you believe it? He looks so much like Tag – he even follows me around. And get this. Randy said he was trying to think of the perfect gift for me and almost didn’t get me anything. Then his neighbor asked if he wanted a puppy. Randy said he knew Jesus was telling him take it for me. He told me I must really be special to God for him to go to so much trouble.
Do you think that’s so, Diary? Can God care about me that much? Don’t be offended if I don’t write for a few days. It’s been a long time since I talked with God and well…I think I’m ready.
See ya, Saddie
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He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147: 3 (NIV)
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