The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1169 times
Member Comments
Fun! Chaotic and funny!
Brilliant job! I'm assuming this is based on the thread in the MB. lol. Great true-to-life story! Sure to be a favorite!
Cute! You made all the little characters real. Poor Mom should learn you can't buy peace! LOL! Written very well and entertainingly. Fun.
This was great, fun to read. Especially since I used to work at a pizza hut, and am now a children's pastor! I loved the insight, and the reality.

God bless,

Thanks for a smile-producing story! I loved it! As a mom of six and grandma of twelve, I can quickly visualize the entire scene! Good job!
Funny piece. I'm sure lots of mothers can relate.
Great scene! It was nice to be here and not 'there!' :)

Love the 'potty mouth' and loved it that the lady's children who complained were 'inspired' by the best!

A fun, enjoyable, insightful read. Well written too! ;)
I agree with all the previous commenters--and I've just got to add that I laughed out loud at the cameo appearance of the mother saying "you should control your children." She just cracked me up, and props to your main character for not decking her.
Great job Sue. I'm the one who started the talk of personal pan pizza on the boards. I just couldn't help it. It's all I could think of when I saw "personal peace." I guess great minds think alike. I really enjoyed your story. Can't believe you get them in so fast.
Yes, teri, my mouth dropped when I saw your thread!! The dilemma of getting them in fast, the mom picked up Justin, who is the two year old, yet she pulled the two year old close as well. I got the two boys mixed up. AAAAArrrggg!
I'm sure glad I haven't been to that Pizza Hut. Great job, well done.
Thanks for sharing this,it was a great read.
So funny, because it's so true to life! Great piece on peace!
Perfect light touch! Utterly believable...great dialogue.

Just a teeny nitpick: Paragraph 11 shifted tense, then P. 12 shifted back again for a flying finish. You might want to tweak #11 to match.

Great stuff!

Sue? I thought Shari wrote the pizza piece? Ah nuts, know I'm confused but than when am I not? In anycase, I shall find out tomorrow who the real author is...

Until then, whom ever wrote this, there's not much more that I can say that hasn't already been said. Thank-you for the much needed laugh! :) Who would have ever thought..."I'll have a personal pan peace to go!"

Loved it! Great job!