The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Wow! So descriptive- I was there, sharing the agony with you. Was this a true story? Well done!
05/23/19
This is a gripping entry in your diary, and I like how it works through to a welcome conclusion. Except for a bit of proof-reading ("swear" I think was supposed to be "sweat," for example), to smooth out distractions, this is good reading. Just an aside from my own experience: my mom encouraged us to cry out to Jesus in our nightmares, and our dad prayed Luther's bedtime prayer with us, which includes asking the Lord to surround us with His holy angels, so the evil one has no power over us.
05/25/19
Is this real?
An interesting take on the topic. Watch your tenses. They jumped around from past to present and back again.
A very descriptive piece.
05/27/19
Wow! What a vivid image you create. This was one powerful dream, and one life-changing night. Like so many others, I wonder if it is a true story.

If this does not place, it will be because of proof-reading errors. There are a few times when you use the wrong word (typos) like swear instead of sweat, lose instead of lost. Also a few sentences that need a capital letter at the start and an extra "the" there you changed the sentence and left it in.

Excellent entry into your diary and into the Challenge.