The Official Writing Challenge
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I love all the body language and motions- well done! You mentioned the topic in the last sentence; to me, the focus would have been stronger had you worked it throughout the story. I did enjoy how made the story so realistic!
Beautiful job!

Thanks for sharing...


This sounds like an actual encounter with Jesus. You've painted a beautiful picture of scripture. Nice!
This is a beautiful rendering of the familiar story and I could see it playing out that way. You brought the characters to life with dialog, body language, and thoughts. Well done.