The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/07/18
Thank you for sharing this powerful and personal story. It certainly is a moving piece. God is amazing and His provisions are always just right for what we need.

Blessings~
09/13/18
Congrats,
Blessings~
You tackled a topic that I believe pretty much everyone can relate to in one way or another. I enjoyed reading your personal experience. It pulled me in. In fact, I might've even left out that first paragraph and started with second one. You also might want to tighten some of it up too. For example, I might try something like this:
Early in our marriage, we sold a house in order to invest in the booming real estate market. Together, we prayed and consulted experts. We did great until the market crashed several years later.
You can see I condensed quite a bit of information that is probably ingrained in your head, but not all necessary for the reader. This gives you more room to use dialog, body language, and thoughts.
Overall, you did a great job of writing on topic without overusing the topic word. Your message is a clear strong, Christian message that will help many who are struggling in different ways today. Congratulations on ranking 4th in your level and 12th overall. The highest rankings can be found on the message boards.