The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/23/17
I enjoyed your story. Before moving to Hawaii, I lived in Oklahoma. Lots of roping and riding.

I think a good hook at the beginning would have set the tone for the story,

You did a good job on topic, but it was difficult understanding where you were going at first.

A good way to start is to establish main character and some conflict that will get the readers attention right off. His brawn conflicts with his ability to take instruction,

Why should I want to read about cattle roping. Make them interested right off.

Thanks for a good story that brought back some memories.