The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 394 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Wow, this is powerful. It wasn't what I thought it was going to be at first. I wonder if different people will take different messages from this depending on experiences. At first, I thought the bridge was a metaphorical one connecting this life to the next, but later saw the MC as someone who wanted to cross that bridge before his time. Many years ago, I rebelled about my lack of control in everything. I decided I could at least control when I died, but Jesus shook his head and said Sorry, that's in my hands as well. The doctors were amazed I survived, but Jesus still had plans for me. I needed that reminder again this week. Thanks for giving it to me.
My red ink is tiny, but you are missing quite a few possessive apostrophes like in Heaven's Gate, harbor's gale.

I think the words flowed nicely off the page. The rhymes came easily, and the words touched my heart.
06/16/16
This is wonderfully descriptive. You wove the words so well. I could feel the cold wind against my face.
Well done.
Congratulations on your EC! I'm so happy for you. Happy, happy Dance!
06/16/16
Congratulations on 8th Place Editor's Choice, and 1st Place in Advanced category. Woo Hoo for you!
06/16/16
Congratulations Daniel on your well deserved win! I'm not one for poetry but your gift is evident anyway you choose to write. God Bless
06/16/16
Congratulations, Daniel, for placing 1st place in the Advanced category and 8th place overall.

Your poem created several vivid images in my mind. Well done.
06/17/16
Congratulations, Daniel, on your EC place. Your poem is gripping and moving, with (thankfully) a happy ending. Well written!
06/17/16
I enjoyed the build up to a strong close. Congratulations on your EC.
06/27/16
You captured the mood of your MC in a lyrical and profound way.