The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/08/15
I enjoyed this. Good job of making me feel the woman's sadness. Best of luck in the Challenge!
I enjoyed this. You did a great job of pacing it. I also liked how you introduced the conflict right out of the box. On the forums, Jan's Writing Basics is doing several lessons about conflict this month. Check it out if you haven't seen it yet. I also think you did a great job of developing all three characters. The little girl's attitude is a perfect fit for the topic. You had some wonderful descriptions too. I really enjoyed this read from beginning to end.
10/10/15
Fabulous job from the beginning to the very last word.

GOd bless~
Congratulations on ranking 4th in your level and 21 overall. The highest rankings can be found on the message boards.