The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 572 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
10/10/14
Oh how my heart goes out to you with this brilliantly written somber piece.

My best friend died five years ago, and I still miss her to this day. We were inseparable and like sisters. So, I felt your pain, it was palpable.

We will meet up one day with all of our loved ones who have gone before us. I suspect your friend will greet you and bring you up to date with all the events of heaven, as will mine.

Thank you for sharing this story about your special and beloved best friend.

God bless~
I love the fact that, although this story is one of tragic loss, it is also one of hope. It is so beautifully written, as a reader I felt like I was standing there watching the different scenes. Thank you for sharing.
10/14/14
The way you gave me information, slowly, I loved that. I reread this one several times!

There was one part, when you were at her funeral and you look around at all the people and wonder, who am I? ... that is profound to me. I understand that feeling, I've felt it.

Very, very good writing, I'd say! Sad and painful story, but so relatable. Awesome job!
10/14/14
This immediately pulled me into the story and didn't disappoint. It kept me guessing.

In a couple of places, when it switched back and forth, I got a little confused as to where I was in the story.

Other than that, I think you did a masterful job of bringing in the many emotions of all involved, especially the MC.
The way you arranged your story was most effective, the good memories sandwiched between the grieving. The friendship is very memorable. One small bit of red ink. The past tense of "lay" as "place something" is laid.
oops--my mistake. You're exactly right! you were using present tense--not past. Scratch out that red ink!
Oh Milly, that was gut-wrenchingly beautiful. What a terrible thing to happen in your teenage years. But it's great that you were able to embrace the hope that Christ brings. I loved the way you went back and forth between what was happening in the moment vs your memories of what you had shared. Very moving.
10/15/14
This is good writing—a beautiful piece! I did have a just a touch of trouble following the story at first, but it came through at the end. And I enjoyed it even more the second time through. I loved the transitions. Keep up the great work!
10/16/14
A well-written but sad story. Knowing it's true makes it even sadder. However, you didn't leave me in my tears. You brought a smile by your hope of reuniting with your best friend in the resurrection. Thank you.
Congratulations :)
10/17/14
Milly,

Congratulations on this tender moving and memorable piece...Thank you for sharing a piece of your life.

God bless you~