The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
08/28/14
First, I like the title. Next I like the touching picture of our Lord you painted with your words. Third I like the lesson although it's very familiar, it's good to be reminded.

Very nice job.
08/28/14
This is just so beautiful!
I loved it.
Thank you.
God bless~
08/29/14
A lovely rendition of full surrender to the Lord here - thanks for sharing your story. Good use of dialogue to keep your story moving forward tot he climax.
A very original and well-written way to teach this lesson. I'm struggling this way too. I like your painting of Jesus.
Beautiful. I love this so much. How gently and lovingly you present your heart.
This is a good illustration of surrendering all to Jesus. I like the way you pictured Him.
A very enjoyable read with a good message. The only bobble I noticed was a minor typo: "sparrow alit" should be "sparrow lit." Great job.
This is beautiful. I could totally relate to it. I've had many similar talks with Jesus myself. You did a wonderful job of being transparent, allowing the reader right into the MC's heart. The message is clear and one we all need from time to time.
09/03/14
I liked the conversational style of this piece and how you brought the MC thoughts in. Nicely done.

"Now you and I can truly walk together." - missing the ending quotation mark.
Well written.

My Lord and I...
What else could we want?

I like the way you described Jesus - So reassuring, yet unwavering.

This reminded me of the song 'The Secret Place'
09/04/14
JK...this is getting to be a habit! LOL.

Wonderful job, as always.

CONGRATULATIONS!

God Bless~
09/04/14
congrats and blessings