The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Hahaha! Loved the last line. Loved the whole story in fact. I too, grew up in the country near a rope tied over what we called "Culpepper's Pond" I know that wonderful feeling of dropping into the cool water on a hot summer day. Granny never knew either! As usual, you have penned a winner in my book.
Charming! I too have been head-thumped. I can identify with the adventurous soul of your MC.
Oh, this is great.

Don't know if this was intentional, or not, so this may be a bit of "red ink." :) As Da continued to thump her on the head, I was actually worried it was abuse. The end cleared it up for me, and all it did was add some suspense, really. But didn't know if you intended that at all. :)

Nice job, and I loved the ending.
Allison - it is funny that you thought it sounded like abuse too. I have a feeling that wasn't the intention, but my thoughts went in that direction as well. But, overall, I thoroughly enjoyed reading this story and found myself smirking at their antics. Good job!
Yes I loved the writing but am with the above comments. Seems a little 'full on' to punch your daughter because your teams loosing. Was a heartwarming story though.
Congratulations on ranking 7 in your level and 13 overall. (The highest rankings can be found on the message boards)