The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Phew, I'm so glad I kept reading to the end! As a parent of boys, I can't imagine being in that situation. It was a great idea to come from the perspective of the little boy. I love the line "I want to be with you, but I want to be with mummy and daddy more. Do you mind waiting?" (sorry if not verbatim!). Well done on a great piece.
I think every parent can feel and acquaint with the emotion in this story. Nicely done and with an excellent ending. One of my favorites so far. God bless!
I will say, too, that as a parent of four you did an excellent job of taking me inside a situation I would give everything I have to never be in. Your story is scary beautiful. If you don't know what I mean by that, then join the's just how I feel. Thanks for sharing it.
You have entered and expressed the mind of a child with credibility and sensitivity. Very gentle treatment of the doorway towards death. Well done.
I like how the story and situation slowly unfolds, gently, line by line, but yet the imagery is so vivid and powerful. The perspective of all that is happening, coming from the child is awesomely done! Excellent job on this!
Congratulations on your well-deserved 1st place and EC wins.
Congratulations! Deserved win!
Congratulations on your win; it's well deserved.
Masterfully written--congratulations on your EC and 1st place wins.
Wow, beautifully written! Super congrats on your EC!