The Official Writing Challenge
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Oh man, that was rough. I just came from reading a really funny entry, then this one knocked me to the floor.

Excellent writing. The piece sank into my heart quickly.

A story that cannot be told too often. One thing confused me -- you used *** to delineate time, but at the end the lineup of of teens to talk to the parents immmediately followed the presentation, didn't it? So, no need for ***?

Another point of confusion -- by telling the teens it wasn't their time to join their friend, does that imply that she was meant to die that way? Opens a theological discussion you probably don't want to have here.

Nice pace in this story.
I worked for almost 20 years at Teen Challenge and know the tragedy of drug and alcohol use. I admire and appreciate that your MC used his loss as a means to reach out to other youth. It is so needed. Good job! God bless!
This is powerfully expressed in its clarity and its exposure of emotion - without becoming mawkish. Congratulations.
Sadly the story of some young person dying from alcohol poisoning is repeated over and over and over every year. This story a good reminder to keep educating the youth of the danger!