The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Such a sad state for Sarah...I do like the ending and how Jesus got her attention. I like how you ended it with hope. The only suggestion I would make would be one that I'm STILL trying to figure out myself...and that would be a little more showing and a little less telling.
I loved the story. It shares how we are all human, whether we were raised in the church or not. Life grabs a hold of us in different ways, and we can stray, but Jesus' voice is a whisper away.
This story has so many wonderful elements in it. You did an outstanding job of pulling me in I kept my fingers crossed for the MC the whole time.
Congratulations for placing in the top 15 of your level and in the top 40 overall.