The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
What a well-written story with an underlying lesson, hidden 'til the end. Thanks for writing.
Great job with the action and suspense, and with keeping Miguel's secret until just the right time.

You slipped out of present tense a few times...a piece like this, with scene changes and a lot of action, might be better in all past tense. Present tense usually works better in moody, 1st person stories that take place in a very limited period of time.

I enjoyed this immensely--great job with the sensory details! Excellent!
A good job of story telling which was an enjoyable read. Thanks.
Lots of suspense. Good material. Kept my attention.
Happy ending.

Anxiety and panic provoking! All because of a pair of boots! Ah, will be kids. GRRRRR...