The Official Writing Challenge
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The concern and conviction of your young MC is portrayed well here. Your descriptions about the sickness are unique and still tellthe story.
05/30/08
Sad story with a twist I didn't expect. I like the way you made the biological cousin a spiritual brother, sad it didn't stay that way.
Wow! I think you did an excellent job delivering this story. It's a sad one, and I hope your cousin eventually came to his senses. Blessings.
06/02/08
Wow! Definitely a bit disturbing, but it does happen. Great creativity and writing with this.
06/02/08
The last paragraph confused me a bit, but the message shined through just the same. The last paragraph made it sound as though the faking cousin was indeed Catholic, but I know he was pretending to be Catholic to stay in the good graces of his school peers. Other than that, the story was excellently told and carried within its words an unexpected message and twist. Good work. Blessings, Cheri
Sad story, well told.
06/02/08
Oh, how sad!

I wish you'd shown the cousin's baptism with more than just the words "also baptised Sunday night." I'll admit that I missed them the first time around, and was momentarily confused about who was being the hypocrite.

Great title, and a very engaging story.
At first I didn't understand the title, but by the end it made perfect sense. I like the spiritual brother relationship attached to the biological cousin.

This story is sad, but here's hoping and praying that if this story is true (which I think it is) that the cousin comes back to God. Thank you for sharing this.
This is well-written and powerful. Thanks.
A very engaging read and gives one pause as to the implications of denying one's faith regardless of how innocent it might seem.
So sad! You did good with the contrast and all of that, with the MC. I didn't see the end turning out that way, but I did guess that something was bugging that cousin. ^_^ Good job.
You pulled me right along until I reached the unexpected ending. Entertaining and nicely done.
A sad story. It made me wonder why the cousin got baptized anyway. I like stories that make me think.
You kept me captivated by this story from the title to the excellent finish. Great writing my FaithWriter friend.